Guilt
by Kaelin BG
Summary: A misunderstanding causes blame to fall on the wrong person in the aftermath of a terrible event. Luke and Jess deal with the consequences. Slightly more detailed summary in the A/N inside.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N** **I've been reading a lot of fan fiction in the run-up to the revival, but this is the first fan fiction story I've actually written. I'm very nervous about posting it, so any and all reviews are very welcome (seriously, knowing everyone hates it would be preferable to not knowing what people think). It was inspired by the fic "Wrongfully Accused" by Squeegee Beckinhime. That story prompted me to think about how these characters might react if Rory were attacked and Lorelai and Luke came to the false conclusion that Jess was her attacker, and this is the result. The focus is primarily on Luke and Jess.**

 **Set somewhere in the second or third seasons. Jess and Rory are not dating, but their friendship is similar to what it was in the show before they got together. In my mind Rory was single during the events of this story, although there's nothing in the story that really contradicts the idea that she was with someone.**

 **Triggers: non-graphic mention of rape, violence.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore girls, any of these characters, or the world of Stars Hollow. If only.**

* * *

 _Prologue:_

 _"I think you should tell her," Jess softly suggested to Rory as they sat together on the bridge they'd individually come to think of as theirs._

 _"No," she responded with a small shake of her head. "She'll hate me."_

 _"She won't," he reassured. Of that he was certain._

 _"You don't know that!" Rory protested._

 _"With her? And you? I guarantee it." He glanced at her, but her eyes stared blankly at the water. He wanted to say more, but he knew it wasn't his place to push too hard. It wasn't his decision to make, and the last thing Rory needed was to have another choice taken away from her. The silence stretched on._

 _"It'll break her heart," Rory finally whispered._

 _"Maybe," Jess answered honestly, "but it would break her heart a lot more to know you're going through this without her. She could help. You know she could."_

 _After a long time, Rory looked up to take in the quiet sincerity in his eyes. She looked back down at the water before quietly nodding._

* * *

Part I.

The Gilmore residence was dark but for the lights in the living room when Luke arrived. It was nearly too late for a social call, but he knew that Lorelai wouldn't mind his visit. She never seemed to mind, least of all when Luke was in need of advice. She was the one person in his life that he could always turn to, and tonight he needed a dose of her insanity to bring sanity back to his own mind. Luke was standing on the front porch ready to knock when he heard an unsettling sound: crying. He could tell that Rory was speaking softly through her tears, but her words were muffled and he couldn't make them out. He hovered, hand still posed to knock, trying to decide whether to offer his help or leave them alone. His own minor troubles had fled his consciousness entirely at the sound of Rory's pain. Lorelai's next words, however, put an end to his deliberation about whether or not to knock.

"Jess raped you?" The shocked words rang out clearly.

Luke didn't hear Rory's hurried response to the question that didn't sound like a question at all. He heard only the blood rushing past his ears. He wouldn't remember later how he got back to the diner. Images he didn't want to see invaded his mind: images of his nephew and the innocent girl who had become like a daughter to him. Images of him hurting her. When Luke entered the little apartment above the diner, he did so in a blind rage.

# # #

Jess was sitting at the kitchen table with a book in his hand when the door opened and his uncle rushed into the room. On anyone else, Jess would have immediately recognized the look on his uncle's face for what it was. He'd seen it enough to know what it meant, but it looked so out of place on Luke that he didn't react right away.

Jess hesitated, but then began to stand as Luke charged towards him. "Uncle Luke?" Jess asked uncertainly with no trace of his usual sarcasm. His only answer, too unexpected, even at that point, to block, was a fist connecting harshly and painfully with his cheek. The blow sent him careening backwards into the chair, and both chair and boy crashed to the ground. Luke threw the chair aside and was on top of Jess before he could recover.

"Uncle Luke!" Jess protested sharply as blows rained down on him. He finally got his hands up to protect his face, but the blows then landed on his stomach and sides instead. He tried in vain to get away, but Luke was too strong.

"Uncle Luke! What-" his words were cut off as rough hands that he still couldn't believe belonged to his uncle picked him up by the collar of his jean jacket and hurled him towards the kitchen table. The edge of the table caught him in the ribs and knocked the wind out of him. It overturned and caught him again in the same spot on the way down with far less give. He felt a familiar sharp pain in his side. No sooner had he hit the ground than his uncle was again on top of him and pinning him down. Jess's brain stuttered as he tried to comprehend what was happening. The pain didn't help.

"Uncle Luke," Jess gasped, "stop!" He hated the plea in his tone, the weakness, but this was his uncle Luke and some part of him still expected mercy even if he didn't know what was going on. "Please, stop. Stop. Please." Instead of stopping, the hits only came faster and harder.

"Shut. Up." Luke barked at him between blows. They were the first words his uncle had spoken since he barged through the door. Jess obeyed immediately. _Why are you doing this?_ Jess wanted to ask. _What did I do?_ He wanted to ask, but everything in his life had taught him that when someone is bigger than you, and on top of you, and hurting you, and they tell you to do something... you do it. No questions asked. So he kept his mouth shut and took the beating.

It didn't last much longer, although it seemed plenty long for Jess. The blows slowed and then stopped entirely, but Luke kept Jess pinned beneath him. He needn't have bothered. Jess had given up on getting away. In his experience, running when you don't really have a chance of getting away only brought more pain in the end. Luke reached down and grabbed the boy by the front of his jacket and pulled him up. Jess tried, not entirely successfully, to get his feet under him as his uncle half dragged him to the door.

Luke flung the door open and threw his nephew out of his apartment. Jess hit the wall across from the door and then slumped to the floor. Luke grabbed his collar again, pulling him up into a seated position and pressing him into the wall. Luke knelt in front of the kid so that his face was only a few inches higher than Jess's. Jess kept his hands in the air in silent surrender, a plea for this to be over, but he followed orders. He didn't say a word. His eyes screamed of pain, betrayal, and above all confusion, but he didn't utter a word.

"If you weren't my nephew," Luke growled, "I'd have killed you." Jess's eyes widened, but still he said nothing. "If I ever see your face again, I will." Jess slumped down once again when his uncle released him. Luke turned away from him abruptly and slammed the door on his way back into the apartment the two apparently no longer shared. The door slammed so hard it popped back open again. Jess saw the fury in Luke's eyes as he turned back towards the mutinous door, and he held his breath as Luke stormed back towards the door. In the end, though, the man just reached out and firmly shut the door again.

For a moment, all Jess could do was stare at the door as his normally quick mind tried in vain to make sense of whatever the heck just happened. It took a moment for the threat in his uncle's last words to truly register. When it did, it suddenly seemed very unwise for him to stay crumpled on the floor outside the man's door.

Jess stifled a groan as he started to pick himself up. His aching body protested his every movement. He wiped blood from his nose and stumbled down the stairs. He paused in the diner. It was dark outside, it was cold outside, and he had nowhere else to go. He was about to step outside anyway, but he hesitated at the door and looked back. He eyed the cash register indecisively before striding over to it. Jess certainly wasn't above stealing, but something about this was different. It didn't feel right to steal from his uncle, but everything he owned and all of his savings were up in that apartment. The man hadn't even given him shoes. So, Jess took a wad of cash and left a note saying simply "I'm sorry" in its place. He wasn't entirely sure what he was apologizing for, but he supposed the theft was a good start.

The ground was freezing beneath his feet as he exited the diner. His thin socks offered little protection from the cold, and his jacket offered little more against the bitter wind. He walked away from the warmth of the diner anyway, knowing he'd worn out his welcome. He wasn't pathetic enough, or stupid enough, to go back and ask to stay. Not even just until morning. How he'd worn out his welcome, exactly, he still wasn't sure, but that wasn't the point. He walked towards the one place in town that still felt like his, still trying to make sense of what happened. _He just finally got sick of putting up with you,_ a nasty voice in his head told him. _Who could blame him? Rude. Disrespectful. Disobedient. Always causing trouble. Getting in fights. Skipping school. The question isn't why he hit you. It's what took him so long._

He tried to ignore the voice. If there was one thing Jess would admit pride in, if only to himself, it was his ability to read people. If there was one thing he was sure of, it was that Luke Danes was a good man. A pain in the neck sometimes, but a good man. A patient man, even, if you looked past the frequent yelling and nagging and chucking people out of his diner on occasion. How else could he have put up with this crazy town for so long? Not to mention most men would've shipped Jess back to his mother a long time ago. Return to sender, simple as that. The man's gruff exterior was, Jess was sure, an unconscious mask. If Luke had simply grown sick of his antics, grown tired of having him around, then he would have said something. He'd have yelled. Screamed. Packed Jess's bags and sent him back to his mother with some line about how it was for his own good. He wouldn't have stormed in and started beating him without so much as a word. He must have had a reason. A specific reason. A good reason.

Jess was already shivering when he sat down on the bridge. He folded his feet under him to try to warm them up. The shaking hurt, but he couldn't seem to stop. He tucked in on himself until he was a little ball, trying to conserve as much warmth as possible, and fought the tears he wouldn't admit were in his eyes. They were just watering because it was freezing.

Jess was a good judge of character, and it had been eight years since he'd trusted someone so completely only to have that person turn around and hurt him badly. Granted, he hadn't _really_ trusted anyone since then. He'd much rather push people away until they stopped trying to get close to him, it was safer that way, but that wasn't the point, either. The point was that he trusted Luke. He knew Luke. So he huddled on the bridge, shaking and in pain, and wracked his brain trying to figure out what he'd done to deserve this. He wracked his brain, because if there was one more thing he was sure of it was that if Luke Danes of all people hit him, then Jess must have done _something_ to deserve it.

* * *

 **A/N 2: I may leave this as a (rather depressing) one-shot, but there are four more parts to this story that I just need to edit a little. Should I continue this story? It gets more depressing and then less depressing. Whether I post the rest depends on whether there is any interest and also how nervous I am to post it. Any kind of feedback will definitely help with the nerve issue! I'm always looking to improve as a writer, so constructive criticism is very welcome!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who has faved and followed this story, and thanks in particular to Meags09, Swiperfox, ronniefranco8, and the guest reviewer Laura for reviewing and letting me know you're interested in reading the rest. Reading that definitely settled my nerves a bit, and obviously I've decided to post the rest. I hope it doesn't disappoint!**

 **This story will continue to focus on Luke and Jess (I don't think I write Rory very well, and I'm not sure I could do her part of the story justice given what she's been through). Lorelai will make an extended appearance in this chapter and the next. Rory will make another brief appearance later.**

 **Warnings: none really for this chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: I still own nothing related to Gilmore girls.**

* * *

Part II.

Jess sat on the bridge for a long time before finally coming to a decision. He didn't want to die. He would buy a ticket back to NY in the morning with the money he took from Luke, but until then he was stuck in Stars Hollow and he wasn't dressed warmly enough to try to stick out the cold night on the bridge. Especially when it started to snow. So, he decided, he'd swallow his pride and knock on the one door in Stars Hollow that might actually open for him. He still couldn't figure out what he'd done to make Luke so angry, but that mystery would have to be set aside for the time being. He figured out how to get his limbs moving again and managed to stumble his way to the front porch of the woman he hated and the girl he adored. He tapped first at the girl's window, but he received no response so he made his way over to the door. He knocked, and when neither came to the door he reluctantly, given the hour and his own pathological distaste for asking for help, rang the bell.

Jess had just about given up when he heard movement behind the door. He ducked his head to hide the bruises he was sure were developing (if they hadn't developed already). _Please,_ he begged whatever powers might be, _let it be Rory._ It wasn't.

"Jess?" Lorelai asked quietly when she opened the door. "What are you doing here?"

"Selling girl scout cookies," came Jess's immediate reply.

"Well, that's a shame, because normally I'd be all over that, but I JUST bought a bunch from the girl down the street. See, I'm a sucker for the girls who come during daylight hours."

"Right," Jess nodded, "should've thought of that." He still didn't look up.

"Ok," Lorelai said, "that's all the banter I've got in me without coffee. Wanna tell me why you're really here in the middle of the night?"

Jess hesitated, momentarily rethinking his decision to come to the Gilmore house rather than take his chances on the bridge, but then answered honestly. "I, uh, got caught out in the cold. Didn't know where else to go. Can... can I come in?" The words tasted bitter on his tongue.

"Can you... um, yeah... sure, I guess... How long have you been out there?" A flustered Lorelai moved aside to grant the kid access to her home. Jess shrugged and was instantly glad the resulting wince from the pain in his ribs was directed at the floor and thus went unnoticed as he went inside. "Seriously, kid," Lorelai said with irritation, "I only got to sleep like an hour ago and I do not have enough caffeine in my system to play 20 Questions with you while you stare at your sh...ocks. Your socks. Why are you not wearing shoes?"

"New trend. All the cool kids are doing it. Kinda stupid, but, hey, I just want to be liked!" The sarcastic words tasted a whole lot better.

"Uh huh. Jess, why are you not wearing shoes?"

"Penance for my sins?"

"Jess! I swear to you..."

"Wasn't wearing them when I left the diner and couldn't go back for them," Jess finally admitted.

"You get locked out?" Lorelai questioned.

"Something like that," Jess evaded.

"Why didn't Luke let you back in?"

"He wasn't there to let me in." _Luke_ _was there, but not to let me in._ Jess wasn't even sure why he bothered making his lies technically true when he could.

By then, Lorelai had noticed how badly he was shivering. She grabbed a blanket off of the couch and threw it over his shoulders, her fingers accidentally grazing his cheek in the process. It was ice cold, and her first instinct was to put her hands on the kid's face, which she still couldn't properly see, to warm it up. His sharp intake of breath and quick step backward told her that had been a mistake, and the redness on her hand suggested it wasn't just because the act presumed a familiarity between them that they simply didn't share.

"Look at me," Lorelai ordered. Jess took another step back and pulled the blanket up a little to help conceal his face. Lorelai stepped towards him and put her hand low and directly in his line of sight. "You're bleeding. Look at me." Jess took a breath, raised his head, and looked her straight in the eye.

"Oh, wow," Lorelai said with a half step backwards. "What the heck happened to you?" She asked the question a bit louder than she intended. Rory had finally cried herself to sleep in her mother's bed not long ago, and Lorelai had no intention of waking her.

"Fell down the stairs." Jess would have to defenestrate the truthful lying thing on this part.

"Seriously?"

"Yup."

"Before you got locked out of the apartment?" Lorelai asked skeptically.

"Yup."

"Are you in some kind of trouble?"

"Nope."

"I thought we were done with the monosyllabic thing?" That didn't even get a syllable: just a shrug and a wince. Lorelai saw the wince this time and was getting more concerned by the moment. "Jess, how injured are you?"

"Cuts and bruises. I'm fine. Cold, but fine." Lorelai wasn't so sure, but she accepted it for the moment. He certainly looked freezing, and that at least was something she could do something about.

"Sit down," Lorelai told him, "I'll get you another blanket." After Jess had been deposited on the couch with another blanket, Lorelai made her way to the kitchen, made Jess some hot chocolate, and put a pot of coffee on for herself. Her tired brain briefly considered bringing the boy ice for his bruises, but more cold was clearly the last thing he needed. She also considered tracking down her first aid kit for some gauze, but most of the blood on his face had been dry and she didn't get the sense he was looking for that kind of help. Jess accepted the mug reluctantly when Lorelai returned to the living room, but it felt amazing in his cold hands. Lorelai left him with his blankets and mug and walked over to the phone. She wasn't sure she bought that Luke wasn't home. At the very least, Lorelai figured, she should leave him a message.

"What are you doing?" Jess asked with concern when he saw her going for the phone.

"Calling Luke," Lorelai answered as though it should have been obvious.

Jess put the mug on the table and leapt to his feet as quickly as his injuries would allow. "That's not necessary! He's not even home."

"If Rory showed up at his doorstep looking like that in the middle of the night..."

"I told you, I'm fine!" Jess's voice was hard.

"He still needs to know," Lorelai told Jess as she began to dial. Jess crossed the space between them quickly and snatched the phone from her hand. Lorelai would have been a lot angrier if she hadn't seen the split second of panic in the boy's eyes. She recognized it as an act of desperation, although she still didn't particularly like it.

"Why don't you want me to tell Luke? Seriously," she asked again, "are you in some kind of trouble? Did you get in a fight? Knock over a liquor store?"

"No," Jess insisted angrily.

"How did you get hurt?"

"I fell-"

"Jess," Lorelai interrupted, "that's BS and we both know it!" She practically hissed the words at him. "You show up here in the middle of the night for help... the least you can do is tell me what's going on!"

Jess felt anger and regret rising in his chest simultaneously. "What do you even care?" He asked. "You know what? This was a mistake. I'm out of here." He started towards the door, fully intending to steal her blankets and already trying to figure out where else he could go for warmth, but Lorelai blocked his path. "Get out of my way," he said through gritted teeth.

"No," Lorelai said, standing her ground.

"Lorelai..."

"You and I may not have the best relationship, but that doesn't mean I'll let you leave. You wouldn't have come here if you thought you had another option. You're my daughter's friend and I'd rather you not freeze to death." The boy still looked mutinous, so she added, "if only because she's been through a lot lately and I'm not sure she'd survive having to bury a friend." The words were hard, but they hit their mark. Jess closed his eyes and sighed briefly.

"Fine," he said as he retreated to the couch, "but I'm staying for Rory. I owe you nothing." He pulled his feet up onto the couch and wrapped the blankets tighter around himself. He rested his forehead on his knees, and the infuriating teen suddenly looked much younger to Lorelai. Her mothering instincts kicked into overdrive. It may have been no secret that she didn't like the kid, but he was still Luke's nephew and, whatever else he might have done, he had apparently been a better friend to Rory than Lorelai would have believed him capable of being at a time when Rory really needed a friend. He was the reason she knew what was going on with her daughter. That was good for more than a few brownie points in her book. She approached him cautiously and sat across from him on the coffee table.

"Ok," Lorelai said with a gentleness she'd yet to try with him, "you don't owe me anything. I'd still like to know what happened and why you don't want Luke to know."

Jess just glared at her before returning his forehead to his knees, so she tried again. "Whatever happened, Jess, Luke would want to know. He's probably worried sick right now-" She barely heard the small, broken, bitter laugh that was half muffled by blankets and quickly suppressed by the boy in front of her, but something in it shook her.

A tiny part of Jess wanted to tell her how wrong she was. How wrong he'd been. The rest of him couldn't bring himself to betray Luke, nor did he really want anyone to know. Least of all Lorelai. Not that she'd believe him, anyway. Most of the town wouldn't believe him if it ever came out. The rest would know he'd deserved it. So he stayed silent and tried to get warm.

Lorelai quickly realized she wouldn't get anywhere by interrogating the kid further. "Ok, fine. Don't answer. I'm going upstairs to check on Rory. There's leftovers in the fridge if you're hungry." Lorelai motioned to the mug on the table, "drink that. I'll be down in a bit." Jess stared at the mug as she left. He resented the order and didn't want to follow it, but he also very much wanted the warm beverage in front of him. The desire for warmth eventually won out, although he was determined to put the mug back before Lorelai came back down to see him with it.

When Lorelai got to her bedroom, she found her daughter still soundly asleep in her bed. She knew what she'd want someone to do if the boy downstairs had been Rory. She ignored what she would have wanted someone to do if it had been Lorelai at his age. Jess was in trouble. That much was clear and, as much as he might not want to admit that he was in trouble, she knew that the only person he might talk to - aside from Rory, and Lorelai wasn't about to wake her from an apparently nightmare free slumber - was Luke. The memory of Jess's bitter laugh stayed her hand momentarily, but she couldn't for the life of her imagine a situation where Luke wouldn't want to know what was going on with his nephew. She picked up the phone and dialed.

"Hey, Luke, Jess is here and-"

"Jess is _there_?" Luke asked in shock.

"Yes, and-"

"I'll be right over." The anger in his voice was a bit unexpected, but Lorelai knew how easily worry can turn to anger so she didn't think too much of it. She made her way back downstairs and sat silently in the chair across from the couch and the still slightly shivering, but otherwise motionless, boy to wait for Luke.

* * *

 **A/N: thanks for reading, and please let me know what you think. I'm still really nervous and feedback of any kind helps. I'm also particularly interested in whether or not you think I've been keeping the characters in character. As always, constructive criticism is very welcome as it helps me become a better writer (don't hold back because I'm nervous... it's mostly the not knowing what people think that makes me nervous). My current plan is to post a chapter every few days or so, although that will depend a little on my nerves and a lot on how the editing process for the last few chapters goes.**

 **To Laura: thanks for your feedback. It's interesting you mention that. I actually went back and forth a little while I was writing that chapter on whether to have Jess say "Luke" or "Uncle Luke" during that exchange and wasn't entirely sure I landed on the right decision, so I definitely see your point and I'll keep it in mind. My thinking was basically that a part of Jess _was_ very subconsciously aware of the warning signs Luke was showing and he instinctually reverted to "Uncle Luke" in an (again, very subconscious) attempt to remind Luke of the familial relationship between them. In the rest of the story he just calls him "Luke" (unless being sarcastic), though, so don't worry about that!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks again to everyone who has faved, followed, and especially reviewed this story. It helps SO much with the nerve issue! I've answered the reviews in my A/N at the end of this chapter.**

 **Warnings: mild violence, non-graphic reference to Rory's rape, a little swearing.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing!**

* * *

Part III.

When Luke arrived, he didn't bother knocking. He simply rushed into the house. Jess reacted faster than he had at the apartment, jumping up from the couch, dropping the restrictive blankets so his hands would be free, and moving quickly in the direction of the kitchen. His plan was to get to the door before his uncle got to him, but Luke was just as fast and blocked his escape route in the small area off of the entryway. Jess backed up until his back was inches from the wall. He still couldn't bring himself to actually throw a punch at his uncle. Luke's threat echoed in his mind. Jess would fight like hell if he had to, but he was also fairly certain that Luke wouldn't follow through on the threat in front of Lorelai. All the same, it was probably best not to provoke the man. When Luke shoved him hard into the wall, a small, pathetic whimper escaped his lips before he could stop it. _Stupid ribs,_ he thought. Lorelai heard the whimper. Luke didn't seem to.

"Hey!" Lorelai interjected with shock. "Let go of him!"

Luke shot Lorelai a brief, confused glance, but then returned his focus to his nephew and ignored her admonition. Something didn't make sense there, but he was too angry to figure out what. "How DARE you come here? Of all places!" Luke thundered, punctuating the line with another push to the wall. Jess bit his lip against the pain in his ribs, but didn't make a sound. "What is wrong with you? Huh?"

"Luke! I said stop!" Lorelai wormed her arm between the two and was working on getting her entire body between them when Luke relented and let the boy go. The verbal assault, however, continued.

"I never should have taken your worthless ass in. Biggest mistake of my life. Everyone told me you were nothing but trouble, but I was too STUPID to see it! I see it now! I never should have put up with you. You think it was easy taking you in? Think you haven't made my life ten times harder? Think I enjoy dealing with your shit all the time? Because let me tell you something, kid, you're not worth it." Jess stood against the wall with an unreadable expression on his face as his uncle confirmed all of his worst fears and insecurities. "Not when you go and hurt everyone who cares about you. Not when you..." Luke's voice trailed off momentarily, "and then you have the audacity to show up here? You worthless, arrogant, selfish little..."

"Luke, that's enough!" Lorelai objected angrily. "What's gotten into you?" Lorelai asked as the subject of Luke's scorn continued to stand silently behind her.

"How can you defend him after what he did to Rory?" Luke asked her.

"After..." Lorelai looked confused. "What did he do to Rory?"

"I didn't do anything to Rory," Jess said firmly in his own defense. Neither adult responded.

"You know what he did!"

"Luke, I have no idea what you're talking about," Lorelai insisted.

"I _know,_ Lorelai. I heard you talking to Rory earlier. I know what he did to her!"

"You heard me..." Lorelai looked even more confused. After a brief search of her memory, she came to a disturbing conclusion. "Oh, no. No, no, no, Luke, he didn't. It wasn't him. He wasn't the one who hurt Rory. Rory said his name and I just... I jumped to conclusions. She was only going to say he encouraged her to tell me! That's why she said his name. It wasn't him, Luke!"

Mere hours ago, before he'd laid a hand on his nephew, those words would have been a relief. Now they caused his heart to stop. "It wasn't him?" Luke asked. "You're sure?" He didn't want to believe it.

"Completely sure!" Lorelai answered. She had tears in her eyes now as understanding and horror crossed Luke's face. He looked over towards his nephew, who hadn't moved an inch since he'd let him go, and for the first time truly saw the damage he'd caused. He was too ashamed to meet the kid's eyes, but Luke took in all of his visible injuries and his defensive posture. He didn't even want to think about the injuries he knew must be hiding beneath the boy's clothes. Luke opened his mouth a few times to say something, but nothing came out. He felt sick.

"You thought I raped Rory?" Jess inquired quietly. He motioned vaguely to his injuries. "That's why you did this?"

Luke's breath hitched and he nodded. "Jess, I..." Luke wanted to say more, but "I'm so sorry" seemed woefully inadequate for his crime. Instead, he fell silent again.

Jess took the information in and mulled it over. He stared at his socks and thought of all the things he'd like to do to the guy who actually had hurt Rory. If Jess had come face to face with the guy, he'd have done a lot worse than Luke did to him. Finally, he nodded minutely at the floor and lifted his head to look at his uncle, who still wouldn't meet his eyes.

"I forgive you for hitting me," Jess said flatly.

Luke's eyes shot to Jess's. A flurry of thoughts and emotions flashed through them. Shock. Disbelief. Confusion. Relief. Then, indignation. "You what?"

"I forgive-"

"No."

"'No'?" Jess asked, incredulous.

"I won't allow it. I forbid it. What I did was unforgivable. You begged me to stop and I hit you harder!"

"I didn't beg," Jess denied indignantly.

"He asked you to stop and you hit him _harder_?" Lorelai asked, horrified.

"It made you think of Rory, right?" Jess asked. "You thought she asked me to stop, begged even, and I kept hurting her? That's why it made you angrier when I asked you to stop?" Things had finally started to make sense to the boy. The addition of the proverbial missing puzzle piece had caused everything else to fall into place. He finally understood.

"That doesn't matter!" Luke said, brushing past Lorelai to stand inches from his nephew, talking with his hands and gesticulating wildly. "I'm your uncle. Your guardian. You depend on me. I'm supposed to protect you, and instead I _beat_ you! You don't get to forgive me for that!" Jess just shook his head and looked away. His uncle was being ridiculous and he wasn't in the mood for it.

"Ohh-kay, I'm going to cut in here... Jess, go sit on the couch and put those blankets back on. Luke, come with me." Jess huffed, but did what he was told and headed for the couch. Luke followed his friend into her kitchen, where she turned to him with an expression that was as soft and sympathetic as she could manage.

"Let's recap the night, shall we? You thought Jess did something unforgivable and lost it on him. You beat him, and I'm guessing kicked him out into the cold?" The guilt in Luke's eyes was confirmation enough. "So he freezes his butt off until he's desperate enough to come here, but tells me nothing about what really happened. I go behind his back and call you and you get mad and go off on him. Then we figure out it was all a horrible mistake and now you're _yelling_ at the kid for _forgiving_ you of all things!"

"I am not yelling at him!" Luke griped.

"You are, and you need to stop. You need to be the grownup here. That boy will never admit it, but he's hurting and he needs you. You don't get to judge him or get mad at him for how he's coping with this. You especially don't get to be even remotely aggressive with him!"

"He's acting like it's nothing, Lorelai!" Luke hissed.

"He's acting like he understands, Luke. I get why you don't think he should be so understanding about this, and I get why you feel so guilty, but you need to calm down and just _talk_ to him. You don't have to forgive yourself, but whether he forgives you or not is his choice. I'm going to go talk to him. You take a minute and calm down."

Lorelai left her friend in the kitchen and returned to the living room, where she saw Jess sitting on the edge of the couch with his head in his hands. She picked up the blanket that still lay abandoned on the floor and put it over his shoulders. Jess sat up at the contact, pulling himself fully onto the couch and sitting with his knees to his chest.

"I don't need any of your pity," Jess said bitterly to his knees.

"Good, because I wasn't planning on giving you any."

"No?" Jess didn't quite believe her.

"No," Lorelai said simply. "I should probably thank you, though."

Jess looked at her, confused. "For what?" He asked. Her eyes betrayed a warmth he'd never seen her direct towards him and it made him nervous, but true to her word he saw no pity in them.

"For being there for Rory," Lorelai said.

Jess cast his gaze downward again, shrugging a little while saying, "that was nothing." There was no trace of false modesty in his voice, only dismissal. Lorelai reached out and carefully lifted his chin to force eye contact.

"It was NOT nothing!" She said firmly. She sensed rather than saw him squirming. Ream the boy out and he'd stand his ground. Give him a compliment and you could practically feel him trying to disappear. She put him out of his misery by releasing his chin and changing the subject. "Do you need another blanket?"

"I'm fine," Jess answered quickly.

"Um, Lorelai?" Luke interrupted from near the bottom of the stairs. "Could I?" He motioned between himself and Jess, and she swiftly extricated herself from the situation and left for her daughter's bedroom to give the two some privacy. Luke took her place on the coffee table at Jess's feet to offer a proper apology.

"I should have gotten the whole story. I should have talked to you. I should have actually talked to Lorelai instead of relying on one overheard sentence. I shouldn't have been so quick to assume you'd done it, and I should _never_ have hit you. I'm so sorry, Jess. I never even actually said that earlier."

"Really?" Jess deadpanned. "I couldn't tell you were sorry at all. You seemed so unrepentant."

"Jess!" Luke said, exasperated.

"Luke, I'm fine," Jess said with irritation leaking into his voice. "I know you're sorry. I know it was a misunderstanding. Now can we please just drop this?"

Luke hesitated. "Jess," he began, clearly with no intention of dropping the subject, only to be cut off.

"No, Luke, I don't want to hear it! Just stop! I'm done with this." Jess shot up off the couch and started once again towards the door.

"Where do you think you're going?" Luke asked.

"To pack," Jess answered after pausing halfway to the door. Luke's world had been on shaky ground since Lorelai told him Jess hadn't done anything, and with those two words it began to crumble.

"I'm not still kicking you out..."

"I figured. I'm still leaving." _No_ , Luke thought. _I need to fix this. I need to help him. How am I supposed to help him if he's not even here? No. No, he can't leave._ Luke's mind began to race. He couldn't think clearly.

"And where are you going to go?" Luke asked.

"Back to New York. I'll stay with Liz."

"Liz doesn't want you. I do." Luke regretted the first four words before they were even fully out, but by the time his brain got the signal to his mouth it was too late to stop them. The words probably would have hurt less, Jess thought, if he'd detected any intent to harm. As it was, Luke was just stating an incontrovertible fact. Liz didn't want him. Luke probably didn't even know how true that was. It may not have been news to Jess, but that didn't mean he enjoyed having it pointed out by someone else.

Jess let out a hollow laugh. "Whatever, Luke," he said. He started for the door again, but Luke hurried around him to cut him off.

"I didn't mean that," Luke said desperately.

"Get out of my way!"

"Jess, please, I didn't mean that! I'm sorry! Liz, she-"

"You should really just quit now," Jess said with icy anger. "I don't need your denials. Liz doesn't want me, but neither do you. You made that perfectly clear. That crap you were spewing earlier," Jess motioned behind him to where Luke had yelled at him, "that wasn't just about what you thought I'd done to Rory. You think I'm a pain in the ass to have around, so I'm leaving. Problem solved." Jess may not have truly made peace with his mother's wavering between indifference and disdain towards him, but it was a fact of life for him and had been for quite some time. He'd long ago stopped expecting anything different from her. He'd been stupid and naive to start expecting anything different from Luke. Apparently, Luke was just better at hiding it, and that realization made Jess want to be _anywhere_ other than Stars Hollow. Jess made an attempt to go around Luke, but Luke sidestepped to block him again.

"That's not true!" Luke said urgently. "I want you here. I didn't mean any of that, Jess, I swear! I was angry and I didn't mean it. I want you here." Luke had been so concerned with what he'd done in anger that he'd barely given a thought to what he'd said.

"Yeah, right," Jess spat with derision, "you want me to stay because you feel guilty. That's all this is. Don't worry. It'll pass."

"I'm not letting you go," Luke insisted as he blocked yet another of Jess's attempts to leave.

Jess's anger level was rising by the second. Six words, he thought. That's all it would take to get his uncle out of his way. The six word lie was on the tip of his tongue, and he knew Luke would believe it without question. He'd believe it, and he would let him leave without trying to stop him. Heck, his guilt-ridden uncle would probably help him pack. Six words and he could leave, but in spite of his anger he couldn't quite bring himself to voice the lie. The words wouldn't just eat at his uncle, which Luke would deserve. They would break him. Jess swallowed the words and threw out six others in their stead with all the cold menace of a serial killer. "Get out of my way, Luke."

Luke paused at the ferocity in his nephew's voice. Not for the first time, he wished he hadn't sent Lorelai off. He stood his ground, but there was a trace of uncertainty in his voice when he told his nephew "no." He couldn't exactly blame the kid for wanting to leave after everything he'd said and done.

The uncertainty was all Jess needed. He pushed past his uncle's weak attempt to block his escape. He guessed, rightly, that Luke wouldn't risk hurting his already injured nephew further in order to physically prevent a determined Jess from leaving. He was out the door before Luke could say another word.

The sound of the door closing brought Lorelai out of Rory's bedroom. She emerged to find her friend looking dejected with his right fist and forehead pressed against her front door. Her heart sank.

"Where's Jess?" She asked.

Luke turned to her with grief in his eyes. "He's gone. I think I lost him, Lorelai."

* * *

 **A/N: Oh, Luke. Way to literally add insult to injury. Twice. Does anyone think New York is the best place for Jess to be? No? Yeah, me either, but as a character on one of my other favorite shows (Lost) said, "hope is a very dangerous thing to lose."**

 **I wasn't sure whether or not I should tell you what the six words Jess didn't say were or leave it a mystery and let you wonder, but obviously I went with the latter. If anyone is curious about it and wants the mystery solved, let me know (review, PM) and I'll tell you. As always, all feedback is extremely welcome and helps a lot with my nerves! Just so you know, I'm reconsidering a little bit of my NY plot, so it might be a little longer before I get the next chapter out.**

 **In case anyone is wondering, I think if Jess had known what Luke thought he did, he probably would have immediately started physically fighting to get the heck away from Luke and out of the house. I don't think he would have counted on the idea that Lorelai's presence would keep Luke from seriously hurting if not killing him under those circumstances, because Luke would probably think that Lorelai would condone the violence on some level (if he actually had raped Rory and then _showed up at her house?)._ It was Lorelai's presence that kept Luke from doing that, as I don't think he'd want her to have to actually see that or see him do it (especially given that she objected so quickly). Of course, if Jess (and Lorelai) had known what Luke thought Jess did, then this all would have been sorted out a whole lot faster.**

 **Sorry for jumbling this all together, but the A/N looked excessively long when I gave each answer its own paragraph. Shawny and christinegrrl: thank you so much for responding to my request for feedback on my characterization of the characters! It's good to know you both think I'm doing a pretty good job of that, and your general encouragement means a lot! ****Laura: thanks for continuing to read and give me feedback! I'm glad you're still enjoying the story. ****stranger-ties: boy, did Luke ever, and he didn't do an especially good job of it! Overwhelming guilt can make us do/say funny things. Don't worry, though, he'll keep trying.  Christie: thanks! I hope you liked this chapter as well. guest: thank you for the encouragement! It definitely helped my nerves! Nancy: yes, this all could have been avoided if Luke had just heard a little bit more of that conversation. Rory didn't tell Lorelai or Jess who her attacker was, but she did immediately correct her mom and let her know it wasn't Jess (as Lorelai tells Luke in this chapter). Lorelai definitely wouldn't have let him in the house if she thought he'd attacked Rory!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hi everyone! Sorry for the delay in posting this. I completely forgot that Thanksgiving was so soon when I posted the last chapter, and I've been away without much internet access. For future reference, if something unexpected comes up that delays my posting significantly, then I'll make a note of it on my profile. Thanks again to everyone who has faved, followed, reviewed, or sent me a PM. I added a few things based on some of your feedback, and I also decided to split this chapter into two parts (so this will now be a six part story) as it was significantly longer than the first three. A little additional background: I'm writing my early season impressions of Liz, and not so much her later characterization.**

 **I'd also like to thank christinegrrl for her private messages about this story and also for letting me bounce some ideas off of her. I think that made this a stronger story.**

 **Warnings: domestic abuse (physical, psychological), a little swearing**

 **Disclaimer: I still don't own anything related to Gilmore girls! Anything you recognize doesn't belong to me.**

* * *

Part IV.

"I left you alone for less than ten minutes! What happened?" Lorelai asked Luke. His lack of communication skills could be endearing at times, but this was not one of those times.

"I messed it all up! That's what happened! I tried, Lorelai, really, and I did apologize, but he didn't want to talk about it and I kept pushing and he went to leave and I just panicked and I couldn't make him listen and I didn't know what to say and I screwed it all up and..."

"Are you planning on breathing anytime soon?" Lorelai asked. She was trying to pull him out of the tailspin he was clearly heading into. She needed actual information and he wasn't giving it to her. He paused and looked at her. She thought she could detect a new guilt in his eyes. Something told her it was unrelated to the guilt he'd shown in the kitchen. "What did you say to him?" She asked.

Luke looked away from her and mumbled his response. "I told him Liz didn't want him."

Lorelai was dumbstruck for a moment. She wasn't sure why, but she immediately thought back to the first time she'd had Jess in her home. "There is never a pie when you need one," she muttered.

"What?"

"Nothing. Just... Luke, what in the world could _possibly_ have possessed you to tell a kid his mother didn't want him? What were you thinking?" She had tried to remain as calm as possible since learning what had happened to Jess in large part because it seemed remarkably unfair to make Jess be the calmest person in the room, but now that he was gone it didn't seem quite so important.

"I wasn't thinking! It just came out! I didn't mean it like that... I panicked... I needed him to stay. Liz is a barely competent mother under the best circumstances! She can't handle helping him with this. I just wanted him to know how much I wanted him here, and the Liz part just slipped out!"

"It 'slipped out'?" She asked in cold disbelief.

"Yeah."

"Luke..."

"I know!"

"You can't let things 'slip out' with him right now! You can't let something like that ever slip out! If you wanted him to know that you wanted him to stay, then that's what you should have said! You should've apologized and told him how much you care about him and found a way to actually comfort the kid. Instead you told him his own mother doesn't want him!" Lorelai shook her head and put her hands over her eyes for a moment, "and after everything you said to him earlier!"

"I know, Lorelai!"

Lorelai sighed in frustration and annoyance. They needed to have a nice long talk, but there was a more pressing matter to consider. "Do you know where Jess went?"

"Back to the apartment to pack. He said he's going back to New York."

"This morning?"

"I assume so," Luke answered dejectedly. "He seemed like he was in a hurry to get out of here."

"Then why are you still in my house?" Lorelai asked. "Go after him." She'd go after him herself, but she wasn't the one the boy needed to be comfortable with in order to agree to stay.

"You don't understand, Lorelai. He's not going to listen. You didn't see him. He's made up his mind."

Lorelai shook her head. "You have to try, Luke," she insisted. "You can't just give up on him. He needs to know you care enough to fight for him. Go. Now. And for the love of all that is good and holy, think before you speak!"

# # # #

Jess walked to the diner as quickly as he could. He used the spare key above the door to get inside, flinging it onto the counter afterward along with the bills he'd stolen earlier. He had access to his own money now. He didn't want Luke's. By the time Luke entered the apartment above the diner some time later, Jess had already packed half a duffel bag worth of stuff. He barely glanced at his uncle when he entered the room. He just kept packing.

"Don't do this, Jess," Luke begged, "please don't leave. I want you here. Just give me a chance to prove that. Please stay. I'm so sorry."

Jess walked over to his closet, pulled out some of his clothes, and stuffed them unceremoniously into his bag. He didn't pause in his actions or even slow down. He gave no indication that he heard his uncle at all. Luke knew Jess would have packed his most important belongings first, and he had a childish impulse to just grab the bag and lock himself in the bathroom with it. If he hadn't known his nephew well enough to know the stubborn boy would just leave without it, he might have followed the impulse.

"Talk to me, Jess, please. I'm sorry. Don't just leave. Give me a chance, please!" Luke followed Jess around the room desperately. "You don't have to decide right now. You could just stay for another week. Another day, even. Just don't go right now!" Luke's chest tightened when his eye landed on the overturned table. He'd been too upset earlier to clean up the mess. Images of what he'd done to his completely innocent nephew came back to him. His breathing accelerated as he stared at the table and fell silent. His silence and sudden motionlessness drew Jess's attention far more than his words had. He glanced at Luke and then followed his gaze, but when he saw where he was looking Jess started packing again. Luke snapped out of it a moment later and looked back towards Jess.

"At least let me take you to a doctor before you go," Luke suggested. He should have suggested it a long time ago, but it now served the dual purpose of getting Jess care he probably needed and keeping him around a little longer. Jess let out a humorless laugh and kept packing.

"I don't need a doctor. If you want to get yourself pointlessly arrested, the phone is right over there. I'm not wasting my time in the ER just to have them tell me what I already know. I'm fine."

Luke blinked at the mention of arrest, but he didn't waver. "You're not fine, Jess. I beat you!"

"You don't say, Uncle Luke, I'd plum forgotten!" Jess's voice dripped sarcasm.

Luke took a breath. "Jess, please. I know you're hurt. Just let me take you to see a doctor."

"There's nothing wrong with me that a doctor will do anything about. I'm not going. Drop it." Luke didn't drop it, but Jess wasn't listening anymore. He continued to not listen when Luke finally did drop the idea of a doctor and went back to apologizing profusely and begging him to stay. Jess saw no point in listening. He didn't trust a word his uncle was saying, anyway. Once he knew he had everything he really needed or cared about in case he felt the need to get out of there quickly, Jess began to stretch out the packing process. It was a convenient aid in ignoring Luke and he had to wait for the first bus to New York City. He tuned out Luke's words, but he could still tell the tone was becoming increasingly despondent. The man never gave up, though. The words even kept spilling out when Jess disappeared into the bathroom and closed the door. He emerged with a clean set of clothes and an unbloodied face.

"This is a mistake, Jess," Luke said when the time came for Jess to head out to the bus. "Please, don't do this!"

Jess ignored him and headed down the stairs. Luke followed closely behind him. Jess strode purposefully towards the door. Luke's footsteps behind him slowed and then sped up, and Jess whirled around when he felt a pressure on his shoulder coming from the strap of his bag. When he turned to face Luke he found him with his hand out, but he hadn't been trying to take the bag as Jess had suspected. He'd been trying to stuff the money from the counter into it. It pissed Jess off.

"I don't need your charity," Jess said coldly.

"It's not charity-" Luke began before being cut off.

"A payoff, then. Trying to make sure I don't tell mommy what dear, sweet Uncle Luke did?" The harshness and sentiment both surprised Luke. Jess had every right in the world to be mad at him, but Luke had never once suggested that Jess keep what had happened quiet.

"That's not... That's not what this is. I want you to tell whoever you want, Jess. I won't ever deny it."

Jess let out another humorless laugh. "Yeah, right. Maybe I should skip the bus and just go crying to Taylor. Of course, he'd probably think it was about time. Ah, no, I know who I should tell: Kirk! He'd make some hilarious speeches. Might even go all 'defender of the innocent' on you. It'd be entertaining for sure!"

"I know you're kidding, Jess, but I'm not. You can tell whoever you want, you should tell your mom, and this isn't some kind of bribe." Truthfully, the thought of anyone in town finding out terrified Luke, but he wasn't about to ask Jess to keep that kind of secret.

"No, it's just a way of making _yourself_ feel better, because _I_ don't want it," Jess spat.

"Just take the money, Jess," Luke huffed. "We both know Liz isn't great at holding down a job. And yes, it will make me feel better to know you have a little extra savings to fall back on if you need it. It's not going to make me feel any better about what I did to you."

"I don't need your money," Jess said as he turned to leave again. He felt another tug on his shoulder strap, but this time when he whirled around Luke's hand was empty. He'd gotten faster. Jess rolled his eyes and left. It wasn't worth the argument and the bus would be there any minute.

From the way Jess reacted to Luke touching his bag the first time, Luke knew the kid was prepared to fight to get on that bus. Jess, injured though he might be, would win the fight by default. Luke wouldn't fight Jess. Luke couldn't fight Jess. He certainly couldn't make Jess listen to him. All he could do was watch the boy leave, knowing all along that it was the wrong thing to do. Jess left with no goodbyes, and Luke let him leave while making no promises to send him the rest of his things.

# # # #

Jess made his way into his old apartment complex and pushed open the door to his mom's small apartment. Liz was nowhere in sight, but Jess was greeted almost immediately by the lumbering man who was, he assumed, her new boyfriend.

"Who the hell are you?" The man asked gruffly.

"Jess," he answered simply.

"That supposed to mean something to me?" Jess was spared having to answer the guy when Liz came out of her bedroom.

"Jess?" His mother asked. "What are you doing here?" Jess could tell she was high. He would have cursed his luck, knowing a high Liz would be far less likely to take his return in stride, but he knew the odds of finding her high or drunk were much higher than finding her sober.

"Who's he?" The boyfriend slurred, and Jess noted it was barely 10am. What a catch. He watched their interaction carefully, trying to discern the dynamics at play. If they were anything like they usually were, then he knew he should get out of sight as quickly as possible.

"My kid," Liz replied sheepishly.

"You never said you had a kid," the man accused. Of course she didn't, Jess thought, why would she? She never learned. That particular surprise _never_ went well.

"Well, he wasn't staying here! What did it matter?" Liz defended her actions to her boyfriend before turning to her son and repeating her earlier question. "What are you doing here?"

"Luke kicked me out," he answered. He took it back, Jess thought, but he did kick me out.

"Of course he did," Liz sneered at him. She'd always been a mean junkie. "What'd you do to screw it up this time, huh? Gotta hand it to you for getting my saint of a brother to kick you out. Probably has something to do with all those bruises, huh? I should've known you'd do something like this. You really are a worthless little shit. Can't do anything right. You know that?"

"Whatever you say, Liz," Jess answered as he brushed past the pair and headed towards his room. He'd gone no more than two steps before he felt a hand on his shoulder pulling him back followed by a sucker punch to the face that sent him sprawling to the floor. _Dammit, Liz,_ Jess thought, _you really need a new type!_

Jess leapt back to his feet. Liz's boyfriend glowered at him. Jess glowered back before glancing briefly at the door. In his attempt to get to his room, Jess had allowed the man to position himself between Jess and the door. He knew he was no match for the man on his best day, and he was already hurt. Jess shot a glance towards his mother, who hadn't said a word. She never did, and he knew better than to expect her to come to his aid. As long as they didn't hit her, Jess was fair game. In Liz's eyes, Jess always did something to provoke the violence. The man advanced on Jess, who stood his ground. He would not show fear.

"You don't talk to your mother that way, boy!" The man menaced, shoving Jess back a few steps. Jess clenched his fists at his sides, but he said nothing. "You treat her with the respect she deserves. Do you understand me?"

 _I did treat her with the respect she deserves,_ Jess thought. "Sure," Jess said, but evidently that wasn't enough. Jess was only able to partially block the punch aimed at his stomach. Jess's instincts told him that it would be worse if he fought back, but he was feeling angry and reckless and he couldn't just take it anymore. If he was going to get hurt, then so was Liz's boyfriend. He got in some good, satisfying hits, but by the time the man was done with him he was bloody and broken. The man had finally shoved Jess into his bedroom and locked the door behind him. Jess lay on his floor trying not to move. If his ribs weren't broken before, then they certainly were now. Maybe one or two on the other side, too, although he could tell that none were displaced.

Eventually, Jess picked himself up and made his way over to his bed. The man - whose name Jess didn't even know - had gone somewhere with Liz, and Jess didn't know how much time he'd have to assess his situation without fear of interference. His bedroom was all but empty. His old bed was still there along with an empty dresser. He'd had a desk once, but he assumed that had been sold for drug money somewhere along the line. Unfortunately for him, that was where he'd hidden the tools he used to use to pick the lock on his bedroom door. Even his duffel bag was outside the door. He searched the room for anything he could use to escape, but there was nothing. The window wasn't an option. He had no way out. He lay back down on the bed, panicking but exhausted, and stared at the ceiling.

He managed to get a few hours of fitful rest before he heard them crashing back into the apartment. The man had promised him more pain when he returned, and Jess knew he would deliver. "Until you learn who the man of the house is," he'd said, "you're not just going to wish you'd never raised a hand to me, you're going to wish you'd never been born." _What an original threat,_ Jess had thought sarcastically. He'd wisely kept the thought to himself.

It was a week before Jess was allowed out of his bedroom for anything except the bathroom. He was released on the condition that he "behave," which meant allowing the man to control his every move. He was locked back in at night and whenever the man either wasn't around to supervise him or simply didn't feel like doing so. Jess usually spent his days reading in his bedroom or the corner of the living room, an activity that was approved because it kept him quiet and out of the way. Yet no matter what he did, or didn't do, Liz's boyfriend always found a reason to punish him. He was made to do the dishes for meals he wasn't allowed to eat, and Jess sometimes managed to surreptitiously slip some of the couple's unfinished food into his sleeves to eat later. A little slight of hand could be good for more than magic tricks. Those stolen scraps were all he ate until two weeks after he arrived, when Liz's boyfriend allowed him to join them for dinner. Jess nearly refused out of pure spite (he didn't need _anything_ from that man), but he was too hungry and he shuddered at the thought of the punishment such a rejection would bring. When Jess failed to show sufficient gratitude for the privilege of eating, it was revoked. He made sure to show a level of gratitude that turned his empty stomach whenever the man deigned to allow him a morsel of food in the days that followed.

It had been a long time since any of Liz's boyfriends had been able to exert so much control over him. He could hold his own in a fight with many of her boyfriends now, and he had grown skilled at avoiding the rest of them most of the time. They may have been able to hurt him, but they were rarely able to control him. This man was much bigger than he was, however, and Jess was injured. Fighting back was pointless and only served to make the man angrier. He had also continued to successfully block off all avenues of escape. He was in control, and he made sure Jess knew it. The ability to fulfill or deny all of Jess's most basic needs, from food to sleep, was in Liz's boyfriends violent hands. Jess did what he needed to do to survive. He called Liz "Mom." He called the man "sir." He answered to "boy" like he was a dog. He swallowed his pride and did everything the man told him to do, and he didn't so much as switch seats without asking permission. He remained silent as much as possible, which wasn't difficult, and he was absurdly and genuinely grateful that the man allowed him to read. It was his only escape. He stopped fighting back and accepted whatever punishments the man saw fit to give him. Jess's unquestioning obedience gained him small reprieves, but the punishments never stopped entirely. Jess was biding his time until the man was sure enough of his obedience to allow him outside. He did what he had to do, and he hated himself for it.

Nineteen days after Jess left Stars Hollow, Lorelai Gilmore showed up at his door. He knew Luke had been trying to reach him. He'd heard Liz telling him on the phone on multiple occasions that Jess was doing great, but wasn't home. He thought Rory might have called once or twice, too, but he wasn't sure. He wasn't allowed anywhere near the phone. Despite their apparent attempts to reach him, he never would have imagined that anyone from Stars Hollow would actually show up in New York City looking for him. He suspected Liz's boyfriend would've turned her away and told her he wasn't home if he hadn't been sitting in plain sight.

"Kid," the man called back to him, "there's a woman here to see you!" Jess hurried over to them. The man never left his side, explaining to Lorelai that of course he and Liz had been very concerned about the unexplained bruises Jess had shown up in New York sporting and they weren't comfortable immediately leaving him alone with anyone they didn't know from Stars Hollow. Lorelai thought that reaction was a little extreme (did they really think _she_ had given him those bruises?), but she couldn't say she wouldn't have been overly cautious if she'd been in Liz's shoes and Rory had come back to her with the injuries she'd seen on Jess. If Liz's long dormant maternal instincts were finally kicking in, then Lorelai supposed that was a good thing. Jess couldn't help but marvel at the guy's ability to come across as so genuinely caring.

"What are you doing here?" Jess asked. The seemingly genial hand on Jess's shoulder was as clear a threat as he'd ever received.

"Selling Girl Scout cookies," Lorelai said with a little bounce. Jess rolled his eyes a little, but otherwise gave her no response. Apparently he wasn't in the mood for jokes. "Seriously, though," Lorelai continued with a bit less certainty, "no one's heard from you in weeks. I wanted to see how you were doing with everything, and Rory really misses you. Could we go somewhere and talk? If it's ok with your mom?" Unbeknownst to Lorelai, the man's hand tightened its grip and his thumb dug into a fresh bruise on Jess's back. Jess suppressed a wince.

"Sounds like a blast," Jess said, "but I've got a ton of reading. Gotta catch up after switching schools." It was a weak excuse and he knew it. He wasn't Rory.

The words were clearly a lie, Lorelai thought, but his tone was flat and missing his usual sarcasm. Something was off. "It would only take a few minutes. C'mon," she cajoled, "take a break! Come with me."

"I _can't_ ," Jess insisted, "I have reading."

"For school?" Lorelai clarified.

"Yup." Lorelai still didn't believe that for a second. Jess had to know she wouldn't buy it. Clearly the boy didn't want to talk to her, but she played along with his excuse anyway.

"How's school going? Do you like your new school?"

"It's ok," Jess lied. As far as the school system of New York City was concerned, he was still in Connecticut. He'd been slipping through the cracks his entire life. Someone would probably notice eventually, but they hadn't yet.

"I bet if you came back to Stars Hollow for a visit Rory would help you catch up," Lorelai suggested, still playing along. _Right,_ Jess thought, _because tutoring me is the first thing on_ _Rory's mind right now._

"It's fine. I don't need help. I just need to do the reading."

Lorelai glanced between the stranger who had opened the door and Jess. "Jess," she began, but that's all she got out. The man's thumb dug even harder into Jess's back, and Jess turned his wince into a look of regret.

"Look, Lorelai," he interrupted, "I should really get back to my reading."

"Ok," Lorelai said reluctantly as the door closed between them. She continued to stand outside the door for a moment. She understood why Jess wouldn't want to talk to Luke after everything he'd said and done. She'd hoped that her own relationship with Jess had shifted a little that awful night a few weeks ago, but apparently that wasn't the case. The entire conversation seemed odd, and Lorelai suspected Jess wasn't coping well with what had happened. He hadn't even told his mother about it, and he just didn't seem like himself. She couldn't help but feel a pang of remorse as she began to walk away. She didn't know what to do in the moment, but she knew she couldn't just let this be. None of it even would have happened if she hadn't jumped to conclusions in the first place.

Inside the apartment, Jess had backed up a few paces from the door. Liz's boyfriend watched through the peephole as Lorelai stood staring at the door before leaving, and he made sure she was good and gone before rounding on Jess.

* * *

 **A/N: poor Jess can't catch a break. That's a much more worrying ending than I originally had planned for this chapter, but it seemed like the most logical place to cut it off once I split it into two. I considered eliminating Jess's return to New York (for his sake and yours), but ultimately I decided to leave it more or less as I wrote it originally plot-wise.**

 **A few of you were curious about the six words. I was originally going to explain them in this A/N, however I'm going to try to work them into the story. If I can't find a way to do that, then I'll include them in a future A/N.**

 **As always, I really appreciate any and all feedback!**

 **Again, trying not to have an A/N that looks super long, so I've combined my review responses into one paragraph. Stranger-ties:** **I feel sad for almost everyone in this story (with some obvious exceptions in this chapter), so I don't think it's bad that you feel sad for Luke! What he did was horrible, but then in his guilt and desperation to make it better he made it worse at every turn. He cares so much and is trying so hard, and yet he's still failing miserably. You were obviously right to wonder what else Jess has been through! He's got a long history.** **DSLeo:** **I agree that Luke thinking that of Jess is one of the saddest elements of this story, because Jess wouldn't do that. I love Luke, but dang does he need to get his act together. I'm glad that you thought Rory's decision not to tell felt realistic, as it's important to me that I get that sort of thing in particular right.** **Nancy:** **thanks for the characterization feedback! Oddly enough, your comment about wanting Lorelai to give Luke a suggestion and for Luke to "run like the wind to find and save Jess" could apply equally well to the ending of this chapter. One of these days he's got to get it right, right?** **Swiperfox:** **I'm glad you're still reading and enjoying!** **Laura:** **thanks for the feedback! I see what you mean about Lorelai. She was more shocked than she seemed, but it probably would have been better if I'd gotten into her head a little more and shown what she was thinking in the last chapter.** **Droolia: thanks for reading and for the feedback!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: once again, thanks to all the people who reviewed, followed, faved, or sent me a PM and to everyone who has stuck with this story. There will be one or two chapters after this one, depending on whether or not I decide to add a conversation or two to my final chapter (it's already a bit long, so if I add to it I'll likely decide to split it into two chapters).**

 **Warnings: discussion of injuries and abuse**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing except the kid across the hall. Who I probably know way too much about given that his character appears for less than 200 words.**

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Part V.

It was nearly midnight by the time Lorelai finally got back from New York. She had an uneasy feeling she couldn't quite explain as she tried to fall asleep. Jess hadn't been himself in New York. Something was wrong with the kid, and whatever Liz was doing wasn't helping. She didn't even know what had happened to her son. Jess had every reason to be a little off, but Lorelai still couldn't shake the nagging impression that she was missing something. When the uneasy feeling failed to disappear the next day, Lorelai decided she'd have to have a talk with Luke.

Lorelai went straight to the counter at Luke's when she arrived after work. "You haven't talked to Jess since yesterday, right? No super secret discussions I don't know about?" She almost regretted the question when she noticed the look of overwhelming guilt that immediately appeared on Luke's face. He seemed to shrink at the very mention of his nephew. Luke hadn't been the same since Jess left. He'd holed himself up in his apartment for three days and spoke to no one except Lorelai. No one else knew what had happened, except Rory, but he still couldn't bring himself to face the town.

When Luke finally emerged and reopened the diner, he was ornery and distracted. The only patron who could reliably count on meals that were neither burnt nor undercooked was Rory. Her meals were properly prepared, but the rest of the town ate what they received or got out of his diner. Taylor had gotten himself permanently banned from Luke's the first day it reopened after one too many disparaging remarks about Jess's character (which, as it turned out, was one such remark) and how Luke and the town were better off without him. The people of Stars Hollow were used to this behavior from Luke from time to time, but three weeks was far longer than it had ever gone on before.

The town at large assumed the boy had done something horrible to get himself kicked out and make Luke this angry for this long. They didn't realize that it was guilt, not anger, that was tearing Luke apart. His guilt over what he'd said and done was only amplified by his guilt over the fact that he wasn't truly defending the kid against the town's assumptions. Yes, he'd kicked Taylor out. He'd firmly denied that Jess had done anything wrong. He'd even told an entire diner full of people, after catching wind of yet another whisper, that the entire thing was completely, 100% his fault. He didn't, however, tell them the whole story. Without knowing what had happened, few believed his assertion that it had been his fault. Of course, he couldn't have told them the whole story without revealing what had happened to Rory anyway, and she didn't want that, but that did nothing to assuage the feeling that he was doing something wrong by not explaining exactly why it was all his fault. Jess didn't deserve the town's blame, and Luke didn't deserve the town's sympathy.

Jess hadn't been far from his thoughts in the three weeks since he'd left. Luke was desperate to know how he was doing, and Lorelai's question only served to remind him of the fact that the boy still wanted nothing to do with him. He understood, but the rejection still stung.

"No," Luke answered Lorelai. "I, uh, think he's still dodging my calls." Lorelai nodded and pulled him through the diner and into the storage room.

"He's dodging Rory's calls, too, you know." Luke looked surprised at that. If Jess was going to keep in touch with anyone, it would be Rory.

"He hasn't talked to her at all?"

"Not a call. Not a letter. Not a smoke signal. Nothing. She misses him. He was half her support system after what happened, and suddenly he just disappears. She gets mad at him for abandoning her, and then she gets mad at herself for getting mad at him when she knows he's got to be hurting. She's worried about him. You're worried about him. I was worried about him, too, so I went to see him yesterday."

"You went to New York?" Luke asked.

"Yeah."

"Without me?" Luke looked slightly offended, which Lorelai found absurd.

"You seemed pretty sure he didn't want to talk to you, Luke! And should I remind you what happened the last couple of times you talked to him?"

"Alright!" Luke raised his hands in defeat, "I get it! But you talked to him?"

"I tried. He said he had too much reading for school to talk to me."

"Too much reading for school?" A skeptical Luke repeated.

"Exactly. He didn't want to talk to me, and it doesn't seem like he told Liz anything. Her boyfriend was there and he said they wouldn't let him be alone with people they don't know from Stars Hollow because of the bruises. Honestly, Jess seemed kind of off."

"What do you mean, 'off'?" Luke asked.

"Different. Not sarcastic. Just... off. I don't know how else to explain it. I can't put my finger on it, but something didn't seem right, Luke. I guess I was just hoping you'd talked to him and maybe had some more information." Lorelai looked visibly unsettled, and the uneasy feeling in her gut quickly spread to Luke's.

"Maybe I should try to see him," Luke said, although he was nervous about the reception he would receive should he show up in New York uninvited.

"I think that's a good idea," Lorelai said. "You never know, he might talk to you. Plus, he might be more forthcoming if he talks to you alone. Liz knows you, so that shouldn't be a problem. She won't suspect you unless Jess tells her." Luke nodded his head in agreement.

"I'll go first thing tomorrow."

"And what do we do when we talk to him?" Lorelai prodded. Luke rolled his eyes.

"Avoid yelling at him," he answered.

"And?"

"Think before I speak."

"And?"

"Lorelai..."

"'Liz doesn't want you,'" Lorelai reminded him, "that's what you said when you weren't even trying to hurt him."

"Yeah, ok," Luke sighed and started listing the main tips Lorelai had given him during their many talks over the past three weeks. "Don't yell at him. Think before I speak. Don't let things 'slip out'. Count to five if I'm getting too upset or angry or panicked. Pay attention to nonverbal cues. Listen. Be emotionally honest and available. Am I forgetting anything?"

"Nope. You're a star pupil. Just don't screw this up." Lorelai's tone had become lighter, but the concern in her eyes was still very apparent.

"That's very reassuring," Luke said. "I'll call if I find anything out."

# # # #

Luke left as soon as the sun came up. No one answered when he arrived at his sister's apartment and knocked. He kept pounding in frustration until a young teenager came out of the apartment across the hall and interrupted him. He looked at Luke with open suspicion and irritation. Luke pegged the boy for perhaps 14, but his eyes seemed much older.

"Who're you looking for?" The boy asked.

"My nephew," Luke sighed, "Jess." The kid's expression changed immediately. The irritation left him completely, and the suspicion diminished greatly.

"You the uncle from Connecticut?" He asked.

"Yeah. I'm Luke." The kid was still eying him with a hint of suspicion.

"Where do you work?" He asked, clearly trying to make sure Luke was who he said he was.

"I own a diner," Luke said impatiently. "Do you know where Jess is? I really need to see him." The boy continued to eye Luke for a moment, but then he pulled tools out of his pocket and started working on the lock.

"Guy hasn't left the apartment in three weeks. Whatever he tells you," the teen told Luke seriously as the lock clicked open, "get him out of there. And you never saw me." With that, the boy disappeared back into his own apartment.

Luke entered apprehensively. Nothing seemed amiss in the kitchen or living room. The first bedroom he checked was empty. The second one was locked, but that didn't pose an obstacle considering the key was hanging on the doorknob. He pushed the door open to reveal a dimly lit room. He immediately began to make his way over to the figure curled op on the floor with his hands tied behind his back and a blindfold over his eyes. The floor creaked as Luke approached him and Jess flinched violently in response, clearly expecting an attack. He curled in on himself even further and tried to shield his head with his shoulder as best he could. Luke paused his motions.

"Don't," the boy muttered with a groggy voice, "please. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

"Hey," Luke answered gently as he took another step forward, "it's ok." Jess registered the step, but not the words.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, please. I'm sorry she came here. She won't come back. I didn't tell her anything, I swear. Please don't... don't hurt me... don't kill me, please." The time for not showing fear had passed.

Luke's gut twisted and he tried to soothe the boy, but the kid was too panicked. His voice rose every time Luke took a step towards him, but Luke didn't know what else to do. He quickly closed the distance between them, forcing himself to disregard the sheer terror the action provoked in his nephew, shooting him unheard reassurances the entire time. The boy flinched when Luke placed a hand on his shoulder, and he tried to pull his head away when Luke's other hand landed there.

"It's ok," Luke told him as he knelt in front of the boy and pulled the blindfold off. "Jess, look at me! It's ok. It's just me."

Jess's eyes were foggy as they looked up at his uncle uncomprehendingly for a moment before blinking with recognition. "Luke?" He still seemed confused and disoriented. There were bruises on Jess's face and dried blood on the back of his neck, and Luke wondered just how bad the obvious blows to the head had been. They must have been recent, too, because Lorelai hadn't mentioned those injuries.

"Yeah, kid, that's right. I'm right here. It's me," Luke assured him.

"What are you doing here?" Jess asked. He half suspected he was hallucinating, although the hand on his shoulder somewhat dispelled that notion. The chances that he was having an auditory, visual, and tactile hallucination seemed remote.

"I was worried about you," Luke told him. "I'm here to take you home. It's ok. You're gonna be ok, you hear me? You're safe now." Jess closed his eyes in relief and dipped his head a little. The movement caused his forehead to barely brush Luke's knee. Luke couldn't be sure the contact was intentional, but he placed a gentle hand on the crown of Jess's head for comfort all the same. _This is my fault,_ Luke thought. "I'm sorry, Jess. I didn't mean any of it."

"Just because you have a captive audience doesn't mean we're going to have that discussion," Jess said without opening his eyes. Despite the seriousness of the situation, Luke chuckled. Now that sounded more like his nephew. _Captive audience._ He wanted to give the kid a bear hug, but he knew a hand on his shoulder and another on his head was as close as he could come without hurting him. They sat that way for a few moments before Luke spoke again.

"Your mom's boyfriend did this?" Luke asked. Jess nodded in response. "Is your mom ok? Does he hit her?"

"No," Jess muttered, "he doesn't. Liz is fine." Luke's relief was quickly replaced by indignation. If his sister wasn't afraid for her life, if she wasn't in a position where she couldn't even get herself help, then why wouldn't she get her son help? How could she let this happen? Luke forced himself to set his anger aside and focus on his nephew.

"I need to get you out of here," he said, and Jess nodded. As soon as he started wrestling with the rope around Jess's wrists, however, Jess cried out in agony. Luke paused in his actions.

"Don't!" Jess gasped, and Luke immediately removed his hands completely, staring intently at his nephew. Jess took a moment to catch his breath, and then said, "my hand... try not to move my hand." Luke moved to sit behind Jess and get a better look at his hands. The right one was horribly swollen and bruised. Luke stared at it in silence.

"Liz's boyfriend doesn't like when I fight back," Jess explained, "but he went to tie me up so I fought back anyway and punched him. Then he made sure I wouldn't use that hand to punch him again." Luke didn't know what was more disturbing: his nephew's words, or his matter-of-fact tone. Luke set the thought aside and refocused.

"I'm not sure I'll be able to untie you without it hurting, but I'll be careful, ok?"

"Ok," Jess agreed. Luke worked slowly and carefully, trying to work the rope without jostling Jess's hand any more than necessary. A few painful minutes later Jess was free from the restraints. Luke looked at his motionless nephew with concern.

"Can you move, or do I need to call 911?"

"I'm fine, just help me up," Jess responded. Luke wasn't sure, after the events of the last three weeks, if he'd ever believe the words "I'm fine" coming out of that boy's mouth again, but he did as Jess asked. The kid tried valiantly to hide it, but Luke could tell that his nephew was in a lot of pain as they slowly made their way to Luke's truck. Luke's expression was one of barely restrained anger and his entire body was tense, but his hold on Jess was gentle. Luke settled Jess in the passenger's seat and then hopped in his own side.

Jess leaned against the window with his eyes closed, and Luke barely heard his whispered, "I'm really sorry." Luke had just been readying to pull onto the road, but at those words he put the car back in park.

"For what?" Luke asked, baffled.

"This shouldn't be your mess to clean up," he said simply.

"Look at me," Luke requested. Jess refused, but the bruises on his face stopped Luke from trying to force it. "Fine, don't look at me. Jess, you're family. I care about you and I'll gladly, and voluntarily, help clean up whatever mess you find yourself in. It's in the job description, and believe it or not, I like the job. It's my job to protect you and take care of you, and you better believe I'm going to make sure nothing like this happens to you ever again." Luke huffed in frustration. "You didn't even make this 'mess,'" he said firmly, "and you have nothing to apologize for. This wasn't your fault. I blame a lot of people for this mess, myself included for running you off in the first place, but you're not one of them!"

Luke's gaze had fallen to his own window partway through his speech, so he hadn't noticed that his nephew's gaze had in turn fallen on Luke. Jess studied his tired uncle carefully. Was it true? Did he really not mind cleaning up Jess's messes? Driving all the way to New York just to get him? Jess hadn't asked him to do that. He'd come on his own. He felt a little ashamed of the childish sense of relief that flooded him when Luke promised to protect him. He wasn't a little kid anymore, Jess thought. He should be able to protect himself, but the idea of actually having someone else in his corner for once was comforting. Jess continued to consider Luke's expression, actions, and words. Did Luke really mean everything he'd just said? It flew in the face of everything Luke said in his little rant at Rory's house, and he couldn't for the life of him understand why his uncle would care about him so much, but he nevertheless suspected his uncle was telling him the truth. The realization made Jess decide to push his luck.

"Luke," he said carefully, "I know it'd be a pain and you've already wasted a lot of time here, but could we... I mean, could you take me to a doctor?" When his meek request was met with an angry glare, Jess backtracked quickly. "Actually, I don't need one. I'm fine. I'll just get checked on Monday in Stars Hollow. I might not even need to go then. Forget I asked." If anything, his backtracking seemed to be making his uncle even angrier.

"Jess, please, just be quiet for five seconds!" Luke finally cut him off. Jess complied immediately and his eyes found the floor. A few weeks ago Luke would have given anything for that kind of instant obedience on occasion, but now Luke glanced at Jess and found himself wishing the boy would go back to being his ever defiant self. He hadn't even meant it as an order. Luke closed his eyes and counted to five to subdue the anger that seemed to be freaking his nephew out. It was largely successful, but the fact that Jess assumed Luke's anger was directed at him _for asking to see a doctor_ made it difficult for him to calm down completely. "Bare minimum," he eventually grunted, "you have a head injury and a clearly broken hand. I was going to take you to a doctor whether you wanted to go or not. And I haven't wasted any time here. Understood?"

Jess shot Luke a guarded look. "Then why-"

"Because you were nervous about asking to see a doctor! Like it's unreasonable!" Luke huffed, anger seeping into his voice.

"Sorry," Jess said quickly, looking back down. He wasn't entirely sure what he was apologizing for, but it seemed like the right thing to say.

Luke sighed. "You're still not the one I'm mad at, kid." Luke wondered how many times the boy been denied a doctor. How long had he been made to feel like his physical well being was less important than the inconvenience going to the doctor would pose to the people who were supposed to be taking care of him? How many times had he been denied a doctor because those same people were responsible for his injuries in the first place?

Jess looked up again. "Then you really don't mind?" He asked cautiously and incredulously. "Any of it?"

Luke looked him dead in the eye. "I _really_ don't mind any of it," He said. Jess studied his uncle's expression for a moment and then leaned back against the seat, closed his eyes, and smiled a little. He may not understand it, but he believed it. For now, at least.

"Then let's get going," Jess said. With that, Luke pulled onto the road and started towards the nearest hospital. Just before they left the truck to go inside, Jess spoke up again.

"You can't tell them what happened," he said quietly, but firmly.

"Like hell I won't," Luke fumed.

"They'll call the cops."

"Great! It'll save me the phone call!"

Jess glared at Luke, who glared back. "I'm not sending Liz to prison," he told Luke determinedly.

Rage flashed through Luke's eyes. "She deserves it," he said coldly. "That guy could have killed you." Jess shook his head, which caused it to throb painfully. Whatever her failings, Liz was still his mother.

"She's your sister," Jess reminded him.

"Not anymore!" Luke answered loudly, and Jess winced. "Sorry," Luke said immediately and quietly, "does your head hurt?" Jess ignored the question.

"So that's it? One minute she's family, and the next she's nothing to you? Just like that?"

"Yes!" The anger was back, but Luke made sure to keep his voice low. He caught an uncertain look in Jess's eyes before the kid looked away, and it confused Luke until he thought back on what had actually been said. He silently thanked Lorelai for her lessons on communication. Luke put a hand on Jess's shoulder, barely touching it in an attempt to comfort without hurting. "No, not 'just like that.' She's family, but so are you. I care about you and she hurt you. Badly." Jess opened his mouth to object, but Luke cut him off before he even made a sound. "No! I don't care if she wasn't the one who physically did this to you. I talked to her _every day._ Often more than once a day, and she always told me you were fine. She should've called the cops, but if she wasn't going to do that, then she should've told me to come get you. She let this happen, and who knows what she would've let happen if I hadn't shown up, and I can't forgive that. I can't just let that go! But _you're_ not going to make me love your kids and then turn around and let them be beaten half to death, so you don't ever have to worry about becoming 'nothing' to me. There are very few things that will make me turn my back on family, and you're not capable of any of them."

"New revelation?" Jess asked pointedly. Luke shook his head.

"No, I just... lost sight of that for a little while there. I'm really sorry for that, Jess. I know you're not that guy, and I'm never going to cut you out of my life. You're never going to be nothing to me." Jess was thankful that his habitually oblivious uncle had accurately deduced his unspoken concern and addressed it, but he still needed to convince him not to tell anyone how he'd been injured. He decided to change tactics.

"And when Liz and her boyfriend point out I wasn't exactly the pinnacle of health when I got to New York and the cops start to investigate that?" Luke looked at him with a unique blend of guilt and fury.

" _You_ don't protect _me_ here, kid. That's not how this works. They're not getting away with this because you don't want me to face the consequences of my actions!"

"You could go to prison," Jess pointed out.

"If that's the cost of them going to prison, then so be it!" Luke hissed.

"Very noble," Jess responded, "you three wind up in prison and I wind up in foster care." As flawed as Jess knew Luke's plan was, and as sarcastic as his response might have been, he couldn't help but be amazed that his uncle was willing to go to prison just so he could get what Luke considered justice for Jess.

The fury left Luke's voice at once. "You wind up..." he said before trailing off. He looked out the windshield for a moment before banging his head against the headrest and muttering an expletive. The last thing a kid like Jess needed was to end up in foster care. He couldn't let that happen. "I don't like this," he finally barked.

"You don't have to like it," Jess answered, "you just have to do it." Luke shook his head, defeat etched on every feature, and reluctantly agreed.

* * *

 **A/N: When the next chapter gets posted will depend in part on whether or not I decide to split it up. It will be Friday at the latest, but most likely it will be sooner than that. Please let me know what you thought of this chapter! You have no idea how happy reviews/PMs (including those with constructive criticism) make me and how much they help to relieve my post-posting panic!**

 **To my wonderful reviewers: DSLeo:** **I went a different way with the rescue tactics/getting in touch with Jess, but I love the way your mind works!** **Nancy:** **I totally agree about Liz in this story. She doesn't deserve the loyalty Jess shows her in this chapter. The abuse and demeaning control Jess faced from her boyfriend were definitely demoralizing, and you see some of the subtle effects of that in this chapter. I hate to think what would have happened if Lorelai hadn't picked up on the fact that something was wrong.** **Droolia:** **having someone betray your trust, especially when you have major trust issues to begin with (to put it mildly), can be** **devastating. Jess knew he couldn't trust Liz and whatever boyfriend-of-the-minute she might have, but he'd just started trusting Luke when this happened and that made it all so much worse.** **Snowbeardolphin:** **thanks for reading! Your predictions were pretty spot on! Luke was indeed very protective of Rory, and he wasn't thinking clearly at all when he went after Jess (as evidenced by the fact that he literally doesn't remember how he got back to the diner).**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I've decided to split the final chapter into two parts, so this is the second to last chapter. As always, thanks so much to everyone who has faved, followed, reviewed or sent me a PM! I really appreciate it!**

 **I've done my best to get the hospital stuff right in this chapter. I'm not a doctor, but I did do research so hopefully it's accurate. However, because I know I'm not a doctor, if I've made any errors and any of it rings really false to anyone who knows more than I do, please let me know and I'll consider rewriting the medical part to make it more realistic (if that's the case, just make sure to tell me specifically what I got wrong). The doctor in this story is based on a compilation of doctors I saw as a kid and teen, and the way she explains things is based on how they tended to talk.**

 **Warnings: discussion of injuries and abuse.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one except Dr. Robinson**

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Part VI.

A few hours later Luke was sitting in an uncomfortable chair just inside the door of Jess's hospital room while the two of them waited for Jess's doctor to return. Jess had steadfastly refused to discuss any of his injuries with his uncle, acknowledging only the ones Luke could plainly see, and Luke hadn't been in the room when they examined Jess. Luke was glad that neither the doctor nor Jess suggested he leave when she came back to discuss his injuries. As much as Jess didn't want to talk about the specifics of what had happened over the past three weeks, he didn't actually mind if Luke knew the end result.

"Jess and I spoke a bit earlier, but it's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Danes. I'm Dr. Robinson," the doctor shook his hand and then turned to face Jess. "Jess, your MRI didn't show anything too concerning, but you do have a concussion. Given that you believe you lost consciousness, we'll want to keep observing you overnight just to be safe.

"As Jess already knows," the doctor continued, now addressing Luke more than Jess, "we've used stitches on the cuts on his cheek and the back of his head, as well as on a few of the lacerations on his back. The rest were not deep enough to require stitches, but will still need to be kept clean to avoid infection and Mr. Danes you will probably have to help Jess change the bandages after he's released. He'll also have bandages for the wounds on his wrists and the burn behind his ear.

"Jess, I also have the results of your x-rays. You have a minor fracture on your left foot that appears to be at least a couple of weeks old. Luckily, that seems to have already started healing fairly well on its own. We'll give you a walking cast for that. The x-rays of your cheekbone and left forearm came back clear. As for your ribs: there were no displaced fractures and we don't have to reset any of them. Based on the x-rays, the exam I did, and our conversation earlier, it does appear that you cracked two ribs on either side of your chest approximately three weeks ago." Luke paled at the timing, thinking of how hard Jess had hit that table, and glanced at Jess. The boy avoided his gaze as the doctor continued talking. "You also have two ribs on your back left side that were cracked more recently. Unfortunately, there's not much we can do to help cracked ribs heal, but we'll continue to give you something to help with the pain. You should avoid contact sports, which goes for the head injury even more than the ribs, and heavy lifting. Lifting your arms at all will also likely be painful for a while, so Mr. Danes it would be helpful if you could ensure that the things he uses regularly are moved to low shelves and drawers. Jess, you'll be able to gradually increase those activities as your pain level decreases, although you will need to be cleared by a doctor when it comes to your head injury if you want to play sports. You'll also want to keep an eye out for any signs of pneumonia. You're also at an increased risk of a collapsed lung given the nature of the fractures, so you'll need to keep that in mind. We'll go over that more before you're released, but you'll need to come back in immediately if there are any signs of complications.

"Now, the x-rays of your right hand reveal that it's been broken in five places. Because of the nature of the breaks, we'll unfortunately have to surgically repair them. We have an excellent surgeon here who can perform that surgery later today. I understand you're a righty and we'll be happy to write a note for your school suggesting they provide you with a note taker, as the recovery will be quite long. You should, however, recover fully with time and physical therapy. The surgeon will stop by later to talk to you in more depth about all of that.

"I have a few other concerns, but before we get into those do either of you have any questions?" Luke was still trying to absorb all of the information. The kid's injuries seemed overwhelming to him and Luke wondered how he'd even managed to get to Luke's truck. Luke had been as gentle as he could, but he'd also lifted Jess's arm around his own shoulders in order to help support him down the stairs. That must have hurt. He also wondered why Jess didn't just have Luke call 911 like he'd suggested, been brought down those stairs by paramedics on a gurney rather than by his clueless uncle unknowingly tugging on broken ribs, but then he answered his own question: because Jess didn't want the police involved.

"When can I go home?" Jess asked. He'd listened to the doctor's explanations impassively. He'd known Liz's boyfriend had made a mess of his hand, and that had been the primary reason he'd asked Luke to bring him to the doctor in the first place. He'd also known they wouldn't take the head injury lightly once it was brought to their attention. Still, he'd never been a fan of hospitals and he hoped he wouldn't have to stay long.

"That'll depend on how the next day or two goes." Jess nodded.

"And your other concerns?" Jess asked.

"You were dehydrated when you came in, and we're still working on rehydrating you. More concerning is that you are severely malnourished and underweight." At this she sat in the chair next to Jess's bed and focused her attention entirely on him. "Jess, when was the last time you ate, and what did you eat?"

Jess glanced briefly at Luke before answering, something the doctor noticed but didn't comment on. "I had a few crackers a couple days ago," Jess answered. Luke ground his teeth.

"Was that all you had to eat that day?" The doctor asked.

"Yeah."

"And when was the last time you had something close to a real meal? Or the equivalent of a full meal over the course of a day?" She asked.

"About a week ago," Jess said with a shrug. Luke clenched his fists.

"And your last real meal before that?" The doctor asked kindly. Luke tried to focus on the ground, because he suspected Jess would start sugarcoating things for his benefit if he caught sight of Luke's anger.

"Two weeks," Jess said after another glance at Luke. At this point, Luke did his best not to think of murder. Despite his efforts, three ways of killing Liz's boyfriend flashed through his mind before the doctor even had a chance to get her next question out. Locking him up somewhere and leaving him to starve seemed like the most satisfying option at the moment, although it was also the least practical.

"And before that?" Dr. Robinson asked Jess again.

"Before that I ate regularly." Jess's gaze was lingering more and more on his uncle, who was still staring intently at the floor. Jess's last sentence was aimed more at Luke than at the doctor. _You fed me regularly,_ he was really saying.

"Mr. Danes," the doctor said, "would you mind giving us a moment alone?"

"He can stay," Jess told her quickly. Jess knew why she was asking Luke to leave, and it wasn't necessary. He was also more than a little concerned that Luke might do something stupid if Jess let him out of his sight, but he needn't have been worried. As much as Luke might have wanted to go out and find Liz and her boyfriend and make them pay for this, he wasn't willing to leave Jess alone in the hospital in order to do that. He'd been too alone for too long already.

"No, Jess, it's ok. I'll be right outside if you need me." Luke stepped outside and Dr. Robinson turned back to Jess.

"Why haven't you been eating, Jess? Did something change three weeks ago?" Jess just shrugged and the doctor decided on a more direct line of questioning. Jess's other injuries made her suspect foul play far more than anorexia. "Jess, is your uncle hurting you?"

"No." Jess didn't elaborate.

"Is someone else hurting you?"

 _At the moment?_ Jess thought. "No," he said firmly. Again, not even technically a lie. The doctor saw through the denial, but there was only so far she'd go to push a patient. He was shutting down, and she wanted his honesty on matters of health.

"Ok, Jess. We're giving you some nutrients through your IV, and we'll monitor how you respond to that. A nurse will be in in a few minutes to try you on some solid food. That, along with your head injury, will determine when you get out of here." The boy said nothing. "Do you have any questions? Concerns?"

"Nope."

"You're sure?"

"Yup," Jess said while staring straight ahead at the wall across from his bed. He'd cooperated long enough.

"Ok," the doctor said reluctantly. "I'll check back in on you later." She paused before leaving the room. "I'm just trying to help, Jess." Her patient refused to even look at her as she walked out the door.

Luke had been dutifully waiting in the hallway while the doctor talked to Jess. His anger over Jess apparently being starved had been replaced with worry, and that is what the doctor saw when she left the room. Luke approached her immediately.

"Should I go get him food?" Luke asked. "From the cafeteria or someplace better nearby? I didn't... he didn't... I didn't know, but he should eat now, right? I could get him a hamburger-"

"No. No, Mr. Danes, he couldn't handle a hamburger right now. He's on IV nutrients and we'll try a little solid food shortly."

"Is that enough?" Luke asked incredulously. "He must be starving." The doctor recognized the look she saw in his eyes. She had seen it in other patients' family members before. It never ended well.

"Do not sneak him food, Mr. Danes," she said sternly. He looked mildly guilty, confirming that he was considering doing just that. "He'd just throw it up anyway, which with the condition of his ribs would be very painful."

Luke sighed, wishing there was something he could do for the kid. "Can I go back in now?" The doctor hesitated, but nodded before turning to leave. They parted, Luke to his nephew, and the doctor to call social services. Her gut told her the uncle hadn't hurt the boy, but someone clearly had.

When Luke reentered the hospital room and saw Jess again, he couldn't believe he'd missed the lost weight. He supposed he'd been more focused on the bruises, but now that it had been brought to his attention Jess did look decidedly skinnier. Luke clenched his teeth and had to make a conscious effort to relax. Jess looked up at Luke as he entered, but then looked away again. He looked irritable and annoyed. Luke approached him carefully and sat on the armchair next to his bed.

"You ok?" Luke asked after a few moments.

"I'm fine," Jess dismissed quickly. There was a slight edge to his tone that Luke chose to ignore.

"Clearly," Luke said sarcastically. Jess glared at him, but Luke merely raised his eyebrows in response. He didn't want to push too hard. He didn't like either of the two most likely outcomes of that strategy: Jess would either shut down entirely, or he would start spilling just to appease his uncle. The former would get him nowhere, and the latter... well, Luke had no intention of bullying his traumatized nephew into talking. It would feel too much like taking advantage of him, and Jess might resent it later. Instead, Luke just made it clear that he wasn't buying Jess's "I'm fine" and left it up to Jess as to whether or not he wanted to open up. He wanted Jess to give at least some indication of being willing to talk before he started asking too many questions.

The resounding silence between them was broken not by Jess, but by a nurse coming into the room with the food the doctor had promised. Luke looked at the tiny portion with disapproval, but Jess just eyed it hungrily in spite of himself. He ate it quickly, and when it seemed to settle in his stomach alright, the nurse made a note in his chart and took her leave. The silence descended again.

"'Fine' is a relative term," Jess muttered eventually, sitting back against the pillows and pulling his knees to his chest. He was a whole lot better than he was five hours ago, after all.

"I guess that's fair," Luke conceded. "How was the conversation with the doctor?" Jess rolled his eyes.

"It's always the same," he huffed," you come to these places for medical help and they feel the need to pry into every aspect of your life." _Really,_ Luke thought, _a doctor who feels the need to pry into the home life of a teenage patient who came in beaten and starved? How dare she!_ Luke kept that thought to himself.

"You've done this before?" Jess nodded. "How many times?"

"Too many," Jess said with a shrug. _Once would have been too many,_ Luke thought. "I only came in if I didn't have much of a choice, though. It had to be pretty bad."

"How many of your mom's boyfriends hit you?" Luke asked in an undertone, deciding for a more direct approach now that Jess seemed somewhat open to talking. Jess shot him a glance that managed to simultaneously tell him to shut the heck up and ask him if he's crazy. "The door's closed. There's no one in the other bed. Keep your voice down and no one will hear us."

Jess's indignation lessened at the realization that his uncle was right, but it didn't disappear entirely. "We're not doing this," he said emphatically.

"Doing what?" Luke asked.

"Going over every bad thing that's ever happened to me. There are things I'd really rather not talk about. They're not exactly happy memories, and it's none of your business, anyway!"

"I'm not asking you to tell me everything, Jess. You can, if you ever want to, but I'm not asking for that. I won't deny that I want to know everything. I want to know the names of everyone who ever lay a hand on you so I can hunt each and every one of them down, but I'm not going to do that. I'm not asking for everything, Jess, I just want to know _something_ that will give me a little better sense of what you've been through. I want you to be able to talk to someone at least a little!"

Jess sighed and shook his head slowly enough not to hurt. He could handle giving some general information if Luke really wouldn't press it further. He started fiddling with his blanket as he answered. "It'd probably be easier to figure out how many of them didn't hit me," he said. Luke did an excellent job of hiding how much the little revelation crushed him.

"How many of them tried to pay you off so you wouldn't, what was it, 'tell mommy what dear, sweet' so-and-so did?" The idea had struck Luke suddenly, and he was now curious if his assumption was correct. Jess rewarded the question with a small, genuine laugh and a smirk.

"Only the ones stupid enough to think she'd care!" The answer wasn't really funny, but Jess's laugh brought a smile to Luke's face anyway until he thought about Jess's words enough to realize he should be affronted.

"Hey!"

"Relax!" Jess told him. "I'm not saying I thought you were stupid. You just love your sister and didn't interact with her enough to know better. It's usually a pretty safe assumption to think a mother would care if you beat her kid." The words only became bitter at the very end, and Jess's smirk had disappeared.

"Did she ever hit you?" Luke asked in a serious tone. He wasn't entirely sure he wanted to know the answer.

"Not really," Jess responded automatically before realizing what he was saying.

"That's not a 'no,'" Luke pointed out.

"She'd slap me sometimes," Jess admitted, "but she usually didn't go farther than that. It wasn't that bad."

"Usually?" Luke prompted. Jess silently cursed his sudden, inexplicable inability to flat out lie to his uncle. He would've liked to blame the drugs they'd put him on, drugs were always a good scapegoat, but something told him it also had at least a little to do with the fact that for the first time in his life he had someone who cared, was listening, and had already agreed not to get his mom thrown in prison.

"Once or twice she did more than slap me, but nothing like this. She never put me in the hospital or anything. She never broke anything. I don't have any scars from it."

Luke found himself nodding, although he disagreed vehemently with how much his nephew was downplaying his mother's abuse. Jess was still trying to protect a woman who had apparently never once protected him, but that seemed like a cruel thing to point out. Especially given how Jess had reacted to Luke telling him Liz didn't want him back in Stars Hollow, which Luke now realized was an even worse thing to say than he'd originally thought. Luke wanted Jess to keep talking, so he just kept nodding along. "Once or twice?" Luke asked.

"Yeah," Jess answered, "just once or twice."

" _Once_ or _twice_?" Luke pressed.

"Twice," Jess answered reluctantly after realizing he'd misunderstood the question the first time. He gave no further details.

"When?" Luke asked.

Jess hesitated. "Nine and twelve," he said eventually. He really didn't want to go any further down this particular road.

"What happened?" There was a flash of anger and something that looked like fear in Jess's eyes at the question, and Luke was alarmed to note the increase in Jess's heart rate on the monitor. Not even close to enough to set off any actual alarms, but enough of a change to worry Luke.

"You said you weren't going to do this," Jess accused. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Hey," Luke soothed, "it's ok! It's just a question. You don't have to answer. It's fine, Jess, forget I asked." Jess rubbed at his face with his good hand and started to calm himself down. Luke may have pushed him a little, but ultimately he'd respected Jess's boundaries and Jess appreciated that. "You want to talk about something else?" Luke asked. Jess shook his head.

"I'm exhausted, Luke."

"Of course you are," Luke said immediately, "you're on pain meds and have a concussion. I shouldn't be keeping you up talking so much. Take a nap." Luke started lowering the bed to allow Jess to lie down more without being asked, but there was something he needed to get off his chest before he let the boy go to bed. "Look, Jess, I'm going to let you get some sleep, but you need to know that whatever happened with your mom... you were a kid and it wasn't your fault."

"Thanks, Dr. Phil," Jess answered before closing his eyes. As Jess eventually drifted off to sleep, Luke couldn't help but take note once again of all of his injuries. They seemed worse when he was so still and quiet. Luke thought about everything the boy had been through, both over the years and in the last few weeks, and the complications the doctor had said they would need to look out for. He thought about how much his own actions and words must have hurt the kid. He thought about how Jess had looked storming out of the diner on his way back to New York, and he thought of how he'd looked when Luke found him tied up and terrified in that room. He knew the doctor had said Jess wasn't in any immediate danger, and yet all he could think about was how easy Jess would be to lose.

* * *

 **A/N: I'm going away on vacation soon, so the next chapter will take a while to post. It might be a couple of weeks. I'm a tad more insecure about this one than I usually am (and I'm routinely pretty nervous!), though, so reviews (and PMs) would be _especially_ helpful! As always, all feedback is very much encouraged and welcome! **

**To my amazing reviewers: Stranger-ties: I'm glad you're still reading! They really are caught between a rock and a hard place for a number of reasons. Liz's boyfriend isn't going to make another appearance, but Luke would definitely be equally protective of Jess as he was of Rory. ****DSLeo: No prisoners, indeed! Parental loyalty can definitely be really complicated. I hope my earlier comment didn't come across as judging Jess for staying loyal to Liz. As much as she doesn't deserve his loyalty, I understand why he gives it to her. ****Nancy: I'm glad you liked the chapter! I'd like to see Liz and her boyfriend in prison, too, but unfortunately I couldn't see it happening in this story. Jess definitely needs some time (in a safe environment) to get completely back to his usual self, and the severe abuse definitely had an effect. ****Laura: I'm glad you're still reading this story! As I said earlier, I wish Liz and her boyfriend would face punishment, but no it won't happen in this story.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: This is the end of the line, folks! It took a little longer to get this last chapter up than I expected, but I wanted to get it right (or as right as possible). On the plus side, this is my longest chapter! Thanks to everyone who has stuck with this story for so long, and of course a special thanks to everyone who has faved, followed, reviewed, or sent me a PM about it. You guys are truly awesome. I was so nervous about posting this story, and you made it so much easier.**

 **Warnings: if you've read this far, you should be fine with this chapter. Discussion of injuries, implications/discussions of past abuse, one mild swear.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing except Ms. James!**

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Part VII.

Jess had had about enough by the time the social worker arrived. Enough of doctors and nurses looking at him like he was a kicked puppy. Enough of Luke looking like he was going to cry or kill someone, maybe both, every time Jess winced. Enough of being denied real meals because of the malnutrition or even reading material because of the concussion. Enough of Luke looking like he was going to ask something serious only to supplant it with whatever ridiculous question popped into his head. Definitely enough of Luke waking him up and scaring the crap out of him by hovering over him to make sure he was still breathing every time he fell asleep. Over the years, Jess had learned to be hyper-aware of his surroundings. Normally he'd drown out other noise with music as he slept, but loud music was another thing his concussion had them denying him. Without his music, the slightest change in his environment would wake him up. It had been a necessary survival skill, but now it was something he couldn't turn off.

"Luke," he'd snapped the last time Luke had woken him, "I'm in a hospital hooked up to a million machines. If I stop breathing, literal alarms will go off! Knock it off or I'll make them kick you out!" The social worker, a woman in her thirties with a no nonsense air about her named Ms. James, arrived shortly after that and asked to speak to Jess alone.

"He's not abusing or neglecting me in any way," Jess barked as soon as Luke left.

"Ok," Ms. James said, "then can you explain how you got all of those injuries?"

"Fell down the stairs," Jess said sullenly.

"Repeatedly over the course of three weeks?"

"What can I say, I'm just clumsy. Dashed my dreams of being a ballerina, but what can you do? Guess some dreams aren't meant to come true," he said with mock-resigned heartbreak.

"How do you explain the lacerations on your back?"

"Have you seen my apartment building? There's glass on the stairs more often than not."

"What about the ligature marks around your wrists?"

"I do magic. I was working on a trick, an escape act, and a prop malfunctioned. Got rid of the prop, of course. I'm thinking I'll stick with cards and coins."

"And the burn behind your ear?"

"I have a habit of storing cigarettes behind my ears. Plenty of people have seen me do it. The other day I spaced and put a lit one back there. Lucky my hair didn't catch on fire."

"You have an answer for everything, don't you?" Ms. James asked.

"Yup."

"Can you explain the dozens of healed fractures, going back years, on the bones they x-rayed today? Or the scars littering your body?"

"You'd have to be more specific," Jess countered. "There's a story for each of them."

"I'm sure there is. How about the one on your elbow?"

"Got beaked by a swan."

The social worker blinked. "You..."

"Got beaked by a swan, yeah. They look all sweet and innocent, but it's just an act. They're vicious."

"Well, I'll give you one thing, that's actually a new one for me." She gave him a genuine smile, which threw him off. He'd have bet anything he was pissing her off. He was kind of trying to piss her off, although he admittedly probably wasn't doing his best work. "Jess, you're clearly a bright enough kid to know your injuries make it clear what happened, even if they don't tell us who gave them to you. I want to help you, Jess, but I-"

"You're not seriously going to give me the 'help me help you' speech, are you? It's beneath you."

"It's a classic for a reason, Jess," Ms. James countered. "Work with me, here." Jess looked away from her. He had had about enough of the game, too. He wanted to go home.

"I _am_ clumsy," he said with a surprising degree of sincerity for such an obvious lie. "I'm accident prone. Always have been. Gotten hurt all my life. I've got this new theory, though. See, I think it was the pace of the city, because when I moved in with my uncle in Connecticut in this tiny little town I suddenly stopped having accidents. Probably wasn't rushing around as much or something. Anyway, three weeks ago I decided to move out of my uncle's place and back to the city and that's when my clumsy streak came back with a vengeance." He looked her in the eye and told her, "if I go back to Connecticut with my uncle, then I'll stop having accidents."

She studied him for a moment. All traces of sarcasm had left him. "You're sure?"

"Completely."

"And if an accident came looking for you?"

"It won't, but even if it did - my uncle would build walls, railings, rearrange his whole diner, replace all his stairs with bouncy house versions if that's what it took to keep me safe."

A smile was in the woman's eye when she spoke again. "He sounds like a good man."

"He is." If there was one thing Jess knew, it was that Luke Danes was a good man.

The social worker left feeling fairly certain that Jess had been telling her the truth – not in so many words, of course, but in essence. He'd been telling her his uncle wasn't a threat, and she believed him. She was very rarely wrong. It became clear in the conversations she had with the doctors and nurses who had interacted with both Jess and Luke that they shared her assessment.

Ms. James's conversation with Luke only served to reinforce her belief that he wasn't a threat. He'd backed up the boy's story about falling down the stairs and claimed ignorance about his other injuries, but his voice lacked conviction and he had a hard time meeting her gaze. She got the distinct impression that he was less comfortable lying about this sort of thing than the boy was. He was likely less experienced with it, too. Jess's lies seemed instinctual. Luke's lies seemed coached. The conviction returned to Luke's voice, however, whenever he spoke about wanting to take care of his nephew and keep him safe. In spite of the man's gruff exterior, she could sense the genuine affection underneath the surface whenever Luke talked about the kid. By the end of the conversation, she was sure Jess would be safe in his care.

For Luke's part, he was still uncertain about the lie he had agreed to tell about how Jess got injured. He knew why he had to do it, but it still felt wrong to let a man who could've killed Jess, and a woman who did nothing to stop it, get away with what they'd done. He didn't like the lie, but he stuck to it. The lie about his own part in the ordeal came more naturally. He may have believed he deserved whatever punishment the law might see fit to give him, but he knew Jess didn't deserve to suffer any more than he already had as a result of Luke's mistakes. Staying with Luke was what was best for Jess, and there was no way that would be allowed if anyone found out what Luke had done. The lie seemed so necessary that Luke had no problem looking Ms. James in the eye when he told her he had never hurt Jess. Still, Luke felt relieved when he could finally simply tell the truth when it came to how he felt about Jess and how he would treat him in the future.

The social worker's subsequent home visit convinced her further that the threat to the boy resided in New York rather than Connecticut. The mother had made no attempt to visit Jess in the hospital, and her interest in the answers to her inquiries into his wellbeing had seemed feigned. She seemed a little too excited, although she tried to hide it, at the prospect of her brother taking her son off her hands again. She was playing the part of a concerned mother, and she was playing it poorly. The mother's boyfriend, who arrived in time for the end of the visit, was a better actor. His concern seemed almost genuine, and he gave a reasonable enough explanation for the cuts on his knuckles. His questions, however, seemed designed to illicit information about whether or not Jess had said anything against them without coming right out and asking. She pretended not to know that that's what he was doing, but she nonetheless made it clear that the boy had insisted his injuries were accidents and had made no accusations against either of them. She was relieved to see that the boyfriend seemed satisfied by those answers. She knew better than to rile up a hornet's nest when she wasn't in a position to get rid of it. Especially when she knew she wasn't the one who would end up getting stung. All the same, she made certain that the boyfriend understood that Jess had his uncle in his corner now and that he was a man who would care for and take care of Jess no matter what. She didn't overtly say it, but she made sure he knew Jess would not be such an easy target in the future. What she'd seen was enough to convince her that this man had hurt Jess, but there was very little she could do about it in terms of the law without Jess's cooperation. The evidence was too circumstantial, and the boyfriend was too convincing. This was one of the things she hated most about her job: knowing, and not being able to do anything about it.

What she could do was recommend that Jess be allowed to return home with his uncle. When Jess was released from the hospital a few days later, Ms. James made sure he was allowed to return to the "bouncy house stairways" of Stars Hollow, Connecticut.

# # # #

Jess and Luke passed the first twenty minutes of the ride back home in comfortable silence. Jess had just fallen asleep when he was jarred awake by his uncle's voice.

"Hey, Jess?" He asked, not noticing that his nephew had been sleeping.

Jess jumped slightly. "Luke, I'm glad to be going back to Stars Hollow and everything, but if you do that one more time, I'm going to have to murder you in your sleep."

Regret immediately took over Luke's face as he sputtered an apology, "sorry! Forget it! Just... go back to sleep. It's not important."

"You already woke me up," Jess said, rolling his eyes. "Just ask already, jeez."

"It's nothing, really," Luke said as he scrambled for something to ask and saw the blanket on Jess's lap. "I was just wondering if you want a new blanket for your bed?"

Jess didn't dignify the diversion with a direct response. "Ask the question, Luke."

Luke spat his real question out before he lost his nerve again. "Jess, did I break your ribs?"

Jess sighed. "No."

"You're lying," Luke accused, and Jess rolled his eyes.

"What do you want me to say, Luke? Yeah, I'm pretty sure you broke my ribs. Didn't exactly get an x-ray at the time. It doesn't change anything." Luke scoffed. "It doesn't! You shouldn't have done it, but I get why you did. I wanted to do the same thing to the guy who hurt Rory, and if I knew who it was I would have. Plus, I know it's sure as hell not going to happen again. If I thought there was any chance of that, then I'd have ditched you at the hospital when you went for the car. It's done. I forgave you. End of story. Just drop it!"

Luke wanted to believe it was done, but he had a hard time believing his nephew was as unaffected by what had happened between them as he seemed. Even if he was, he _shouldn't_ be. Luke looked over at his nephew. He tried to remember all of the advice that Lorelai had given him over the past three weeks. The most applicable seemed to be her instruction to be "emotionally honest and available." That kind of thing wasn't always easy for Luke, but for Jess he'd try.

"It scares me, you know," Luke admitted. "To think you could really forgive me that quickly. It's like you don't even know you deserve better than that. Just because you're used to it doesn't mean it's ok. You deserved so much better, Jess. It scares me to think about what your life must have been like all those years when I wasn't paying attention for you to think what I did was nothing. I broke two of your ribs, but hey, the next guy broke four, so no big deal!"

Jess shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Despite their little talk in the hospital, he still didn't particularly like talking about his past. "I didn't say it was nothing," Jess said, voice quiet and frustrated, "and I didn't say it was ok. I said I forgave it. There's a difference. The act of forgiveness kind of implies there's something that needs to be forgiven. What the others did... they hurt me in so many ways over the years, Luke, but it wasn't the same. I don't want to talk specifics, but it just wasn't." Luke glanced over to see a distant look he didn't like in his nephew's eyes. It was more than the dull look the concussion/pain med combo had given the boy these last few days, and it unnerved him.

"We can drop it," Luke told him. "If you don't want to talk about it, then I'll respect that."

Jess was grateful, but he needed Luke to understand something. "Back at the apartment - if Liz's boyfriend had walked in after you'd seen what he did to me, what would you have done?" The murderous look in Luke's eye and his sudden death grip on the steering wheel were answer enough. "That's what I thought. Guy's a giant, but you'd have killed him or died trying. You wouldn't even have thought about it. Not the consequences or anything. You wouldn't even have been logical enough to think about what would happen to me if you died or went to prison. I can forgive you because Rory is your family, and I know you'd do the same for me." Jess's voice then got very small, and he looked out the window as he muttered the rest, "being hit isn't new for me. Having someone who actually gives a shit when it happens? That is."

Luke looked over at his nephew, who was still engaged in the conversation even as he continued to gaze out of the window. He didn't quite know how to respond to the boy's revelation. Luke knew he wouldn't forgive himself so easily, in fact he wasn't sure he ever truly would, but he would stop trying to reject Jess's forgiveness. He couldn't put that wall between them. Jess was right. Luke would kill or die for this boy, for _his_ boy, without thought or hesitation. He could learn to set his guilt aside enough to be the parent Jess needed. He couldn't change the past, any of it, but he would do whatever it took to help his kid heal. He would make sure he was ok.

"That's a really low bar, Jess," Luke said when he finally put his thoughts together.

"Yeah, well, the people in my life haven't exactly been Olympic pole vaulters, have they?"

"No, I guess not. That doesn't mean you don't deserve better, though," Luke told him. The two fell back into silence for a few minutes before Luke spoke again. "Look, Jess, I'm not blaming you in any way..."

"Terrible way to start a sentence, then, but go on."

"I'm really not, Jess. I'm sure you had your reasons and I'm sure they were good reasons. I just want to understand them." Jess waited anxiously for the rest of the thought. "Why would you go back to New York? Knowing what it would be like? Was the idea of living with me _that_ awful?"

"You wouldn't understand," Jess said with a shake of his head.

"Try me. Try to explain, please. I want to understand. I mean, were you worried I was going to hit you again?" Jess looked at his uncle and could tell at a glance that he really wasn't blaming Jess for his decision to return to New York. He was blaming himself. Jess sighed.

"No, it wasn't... I didn't..." Jess didn't often truly struggle for words. He often chose not to use them, and they sometimes got caught between his brain and his mouth even when he did want to say them, but they were usually there. He started again, addressing only the last part of Luke's question. "I almost said that to you, you know. When I wanted you to let me leave Lorelai's house. I almost told you I didn't feel safe with you, but it would've been a lie."

"Then why would you almost say it?"

"Because it would've made you feel guilty enough to let me leave. You already felt awful, so you would've believed it, and you would've thought no kid should have to feel unsafe in their own home. At the time, you would've thought I'd at least feel physically safe in New York."

"Ok," Luke said, "then why didn't you say it?"

"You already felt horrible. You knew it was a one time thing and you knew that I knew that, too. It was an aberration, but if I didn't know that then you wouldn't have been able to think of it that way. You'd have felt like every other child abuser in the world who's ever beaten a kid and then promised never to do it again. You'd have thought you'd permanently traumatized a kid you were supposed to take care of. You probably would've thought I only said I understood and forgave you because I was too afraid to express anger. You'd have seen virtually no distinction between what you did and what people like Liz's boyfriend do. You would've felt like a straight up child abuser. I figured it wouldn't even really matter who the kid was, just the idea of that, of being a child abuser, would've broken you. You're too good a man to live with that. I know what you think of guys like that. You could've handled my anger, but I didn't think you could've handled the idea of my continuing fear."

Luke had to admit that Jess had a point. About some of it, at least. "It did matter who the kid was, Jess. I didn't feel so horrible because I'd hurt 'a kid I was supposed to take care of.' I'd have felt terrible about hurting any kid, but I felt that horrible because I hurt _you_ and I care about you. I hurt someone I loved, Jess, that's why I felt as bad as I did. That's what would've made the idea of you fearing me so hard to live with." Jess's eyes flickered over Luke's face, seeming to look for something, and then fell to his own lap. His expression was unreadable, and Luke decided to let it go for the time being and return to the rest of Jess's statement. "So you didn't say it because you didn't want to hurt me? After everything I did?" The thought broke Luke's heart. He didn't deserve this kid.

"Oh, I wanted to hurt you," Jess clarified, "just not irreparably." Luke glanced over at Jess. If anything, Luke was more confused.

"Ok, if you weren't scared and you still cared enough to not want to irreparably harm me, then why would you leave to go back to an abusive home?"

"Because I cared enough to not want to irreparably harm you," Jess answered matter-of-factly. The words were said as though they should be explanation enough. Judging by the look on Luke's face, they weren't.

"You gotta help me out here, Jess," Luke plead. Jess looked tired and like he wanted the conversation to be over, but he still tried to explain.

"I don't like people as a whole, and the feeling is generally mutual. I don't trust people, either. Not adults, anyway. Not Liz. Not her boyfriends. Not teachers. Not social workers. Not cops," Jess chuckled, "not freaking Lorelai Gilmore. I haven't really trusted anyone in years, and the last guy I trusted... well, let's just say he did a lot worse than any of the others. I've had plenty of guys try to bond with me, act like they care about me and like me, try and play daddy, you know? But it was always just an act. Caring and trusting just got me hurt, so I stopped. Until I started to care about and trust you. Until I started to believe you actually cared about me and it wasn't just an act..." Jess trailed off. He shifted uncomfortably again and stared out the passenger side window.

"And then I went and shattered that trust and destroyed that belief," Luke finished for him. Jess nodded almost imperceptibly. "I'm so sorry, Jess. For everything. For hitting you. For yelling at you. All that stuff I said to you? I didn't mean it."

"So you've said," Jess stated in a tired voice. "You know, we really don't have to do this, Luke."

"Yeah, we do, because I'm still not sure you believe me. I didn't mean any of it." Jess sighed, but he gave Luke his undivided attention. If they were going to have this conversation, then they might as well _have_ the conversation.

"So taking me in didn't make your life harder?" Jess challenged. "You habitually make random trips to New York and leave your diner for days before I came along? I didn't make your life harder?"

"No, you didn't," Luke responded immediately. Jess shook his head and went back to looking out the window.

"Whatever you say, Uncle Luke."

"Don't do that," Luke half ordered, half plead.

"Don't lie to me," Jess retorted, glaring at his uncle. Luke glanced between Jess and the road. He knew Jess too well now to think he'd buy anything less than the truth.

"Yeah. Yeah, ok. The truth is that taking you in complicated my life, but that's true of any kid and any parent or guardian. Do you really think having Rory didn't complicate Lorelai's life? Do you think that makes Lorelai regret having Rory?" Luke stole another glance at Jess, who was at least engaged in the conversation again. "Do you know what the least true thing I said that night was? Setting aside the name calling? That you weren't worth it. You are, Jess. Taking care of a kid complicates things sometimes, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Honestly, ask Lorelai what I've been like the last three weeks. And you weren't the reason I had to stay in New York. That would be your mom and that psychopath's doing. Not to mention mine for betraying your trust and making you leave Stars Hollow in the first place."

"I was never worth it to her," Jess pointed out.

"That's because she's an idiot!" Luke barked. "She doesn't know how to do something for another human being. She's selfish. Always has been. She should've known you were worth it, Jess, but it's her problem that she didn't. It wasn't because of you, I swear! You do know that, right? On some level?"

"Yeah, I know," Jess answered unconvincingly.

"You will," Luke vowed, "eventually. I'll make sure of it. You'll see." Jess nodded, although he honestly wasn't sure why. "I was so mad when I said all of that, Jess. That's not how I really feel. In the moment? Yeah, I regretted taking you in, but only because I thought if I'd never brought you to Stars Hollow, then Rory never would've been hurt like that. That's the only place the regret came from. It came from something you didn't do and something I should've known you wouldn't do. I know you thought it was separate from that, but it wasn't. It was about some evil, alternate version of you that doesn't exist!

"Jess, I know I broke your trust, in so many ways, but I promise you I'll prove you can trust me again. I'll be worthy of your trust this time. I don't expect you to completely believe that overnight, but I _will_ prove it!" There was absolute conviction in Luke's voice. However long it took, he would prove it. Luke and Jess fell silent for a few minutes as both of their minds wandered. It was Jess who ultimately broke the silence.

"You know, I might've had a chance when you first came after me," Jess pondered aloud, "if I didn't trust you. I should've known the second you walked into the room. I think I could've gotten away if I'd been quicker. Trust makes you vulnerable." The statement saddened Luke. He just hoped his betrayal wouldn't be that one last thing that completely and permanently destroyed Jess's ability to trust.

"It can," Luke admitted, "but it's worth it. Never trusting anyone? That's no way to live. You just need to find people who deserve your trust."

"That's real easy to say, Luke, but not trusting people kept me alive." Jess sighed, "I'm working on it. For what it's worth, I do trust you. For the most part, anyway. Pretty sure Liz is the only one I've ever given that kind of second chance to, though, so don't…" Jess trailed off.

"I won't," Luke promised quickly. He didn't need to hear the rest of the sentence. Let me down? Be like Liz? Hurt me again? It didn't matter what the rest of the sentence was: Luke wasn't going to throw away a second chance with this kid. He knew without a doubt that he wouldn't get a third, and as heartbreaking as that would be for _him,_ it would be far worse for Jess. He glanced over at his nephew, and he knew it wasn't just the bruises and breaks that needed healing. He wished the psychological trauma was as simple to fix as the breaks were. He knew it would take time, and patience, and perseverance, and he would do whatever it took for as long as it took. Lorelai would help, too, Luke knew. She was already giving him advice, and he knew she'd be there for Jess, too, if he ever let her. Luke glanced over at Jess again and noticed the uncertainty in his eye. _Trust makes you vulnerable,_ he'd said. Luke wondered just how many ways the kid had meant that statement.

"I won't," Luke promised again. He wasn't sure what else he could say, but he got the sense that Jess didn't want him to say much more, anyway. He seemed to have reached his limit when it came to talking. Luke also got the sense that if he wanted Jess to feel comfortable having these conversations in the future, then he should respect that. So, Luke said nothing else and instead merely squeezed Jess's arm lightly and went back to focusing on the road.

Luke shot yet another glance back over at his nephew, who was still staring out his window with increasingly exhausted eyes. "You can get some sleep if you want," Luke told him.

"Thanks," Jess said with a yawn, as grateful to his uncle for dropping the subject as he was for the promised rest. "I just want to get home, crawl in bed, not talk to anyone and sleep for a week," he admitted.

"That sounds like a good plan," Luke said. "Get some sleep. I won't wake you up this time."

Jess leaned a groggy, aching head against the window and closed his eyes. "You promise?" He asked quietly. Luke laid a hand on his not-quite-sleeping nephew's head and was a little surprised when it wasn't immediately shrugged off in annoyance.

"Yeah, kid, I promise."

* * *

 **A/N: well, that's it! I hope you all enjoyed this story. I know it's the end of the story, but I'd still really love your feedback on this chapter (or the story writ large or anything else, really), so please review or send me a PM. If you have any questions about the story or anything like that, I'm definitely open to sharing additional thoughts on it so shoot me a PM! And FYI, because I didn't know this when I started reading fics here, you don't need an account to leave a review!**

 **In case anyone missed it, "I don't feel safe with you" was the six word lie referenced in Chapter 3.**

 **I got more reviews for the last chapter than I usually do (THANK YOU), so I'm going to break with what I've been doing thus far and only respond to the reviewers who don't have accounts here in the A/N (and I'll respond to those who do have accounts with a PM... probably should've done this all along, but you live, you learn). General thanks to everyone for wishing me a nice vacation!**

 **Nancy:** **thank you for both this review and all of your reviews. I really appreciate your readership and the fact that you took the time to give feedback so often. Doctors indeed have a fine line to walk, and I'm glad that you appreciated that part of the story. I agree with your assessment of Luke, and I definitely agree that he will truly never harm Jess again nor will he jump to conclusions. He'll punish a healthy Jess if it's in Jess's best interest, but he'll never hit him. It certainly won't be an easy recovery for Jess, but he's on the right path and both Luke and Lorelai will be there for him (and he and Rory will both help each other). Thank you again for all the feedback. DanishGirl: I'm so glad you're enjoying the story, and thanks so much for the feedback! I'm glad you like the relationship between Luke and Jess in this story, and I hope you liked the conclusion. Shawny: Thank you for the feedback and both of your reviews. I'm so glad that you're still reading and enjoying this story! **


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